The Symphony and Beats of Zen
by Sammyclammy23
Summary: Sometimes Life isn't What you expected , sometimes you live nine lives , some don't get that Lucky...sometimes you wake up from dreams just to see all you missed out on. "What do you Plan now?" ..."lil ole me ?..just being a humble bounty hunter "
1. Walking on dream

I Do Not own cowboy bebop or it's characters, I also do not own any songs in this fic ...I own my cat and hyperactive personality ... Now on with the story ...

Walking on a Dream

" Walking on a dream

How can I explain

Talking to myself

Will I see again"

"Jet!?" "...Jet ?"Jeettttttttt!"

"Mph where's that old man when you need him"

Faye fell straight in the yellow couch of Fake promises of Life and False dreams of eating a steak dinner with money flying out your ass .

"Well honey I'm home" Faye spewed

God when is my life gonna get easier this sucks it's 100 million degrees on Ganymede today and the bounty got away ...

"Serves Jet right for sending me after a small fry who steals panties at some gyms ughhhh I wanna throw up "

Faye slid more down the couch till she was on the floor

"Resting again huh faye? "

"No Jet I'm practicing yoga ... Where did you go did you finally find yourself a lover .."

"No I went grocery shopping cause you ate all the damn food ! How did the bounty go? "

Faye got up from the floor " He got away , what else is new and before you beat my ears off old man it's your fault you can't send an Asian beauty to catch a pervert I know it should be my fortay as you would say but he tried to sniff me somewhere not fun ! Do you know how degrading that is !? Having a lectures old man try to sniff your behind !? No cause you stay on the ship playing house with your trees all damn day and night and send me so don't go there and further more..."

"Can it Faye , shit happens don't worry about it, are you ok? "

Faye stood up and looked at Jet shocked . Since when did he take her messing up so lightly

" well yeah I'm glad you finally understand it's not easy Jet "

Jet was walking to the kitchen putting the groceries away, Faye followed him looking at him as if he was sick

"So are you feeling ok old man ? you know if your dying I'll have to make you a burial at sea cause we have no woolongs to bury your old ass "

Faye snickered

"well I'm not dying anytime soon ... I feel fine I just got some good news today ..well two good things I found out"

Faye started rummaging through the bags , she grabbed a slim Jim unwrapped it as if it was a prime rib shoving it in her mouth very unladylike

" whaff cub be grood rews "

Faye swallowed her slim Jim

"we hit the lottery and I found out my great auntie limbo left 600 million woos?"

Jet just looked at her and then smiled

"No actually Bob called me "

Faye started on a bag of chips now "What did that freak want "

Jet grabbed the chips out of her hands .

Faye just pouted

"Well my good friend Bob gave me a lead that's worth 5 million woolongs , that's 2.5 split between the two of us "

Faye grabbed a twinke out of the bag . She still couldn't believe that they still made these glorious fatty cake .

guess one thing made it of the gate explosion .

"Faye are you listening to me !? " Jet screamed taking her attention off the cake and her crappy life

"yeah I'm listening , so what's the deal with this bounty ? How come it wasn't on this weeks Bountys and home shopping?"

Jet walked in the rec room and sat . Faye followed suit Putting her feet on the table .

" that show went to shit , now it gives you a small fry and gives you a chance to buy a moo cow creamer that moos when your pour your cream in your coffee... Damn liars"

Faye lit up a ciggerate and laughed , poor Jet he really thought it would moo

"so like I was saying i before the public view recognize it issp wants this dude out "

Faye grabbed the ashtray and sat Indian style

"so what's the crime this guys doin?"

Jet light up his cigg and inhaled while typing

"this guys a drug dealer, new and up coming ,the teens and college kids are eating it up like candy , supposedly it's the best on the market no other like it "

Faye got up and slammed her ashtray

"no Jet I'm not dealing in syndicate crap not after all that shit hit the fan c'mon you really wanna stir up that trouble again .. I'm not in this "

Jet started laughing "it's not red eye or syndicate drugs not coke , crack or meth " Faye sat there puzzled

" then what kinda drugs is it jet ?

" Jet smiled " old fashioned weed

" Faye started laughing "c'mon Jet a 5 million woo reward for weed stop pulling my leg this sounds fake as shit I think Bob maybe should stop smoking the magic dragon himself "

" No Faye it's real as can be word on the street is retro is in , the teens love the grass , and the last of the syndicates are losing there minds cause they ain't selling the heavy stuff right now , my guess is they put this bounty in themselves , you know that issp has crooked cops working for the syndicates left and right they want this guy out "

Faye sat next to Jet by the vid screen

" so what else you got on this weed master , what's he go by ?"

Jet pulled up the file with no picture just a name "John Lennon he goes by ... They don't have a pic of him he's just a delivery guy he wears a mask and drives a retro aircraft "

Faye just started laughing "wow Jet really so we just now a name and a rusty old air craft , this is stupid I'm going to get some beauty rest wake me up when you get a real bounty " Faye got up to go to her room

" Faye there's more issp got a serial number on the aircraft I looked into it "

Faye walked back into the living room "ok, where's it from Sherlock?"

Jet gave her a genuine confused look. "whatever way before your time rugrat "

Jet rubbed his head " leads back to the same serial number on the swordfish ... Dohann " Faye looked at Jet with a somber look

"You know it's gonna be 2 years since that asshole left"

Jet put his head down " I know and I also know this is tough and we need the money, shit I don't even know if Dohann knows spikes dead , but Faye I know it's hard but we gotta do it "

Faye was angry at this point " Jet I don't give a rats ass anymore he did what he had to. whatever let's make some money I need a lil vacation after this craps over ... When do we start "

"Tommorow were gonna take a trip to Dohann himself plus we got pick up someone else" Jet said

" who the hell do we have to pick up !? " Faye screamed

Jet smiled

"Ed called she wants to come home"

Faye slammed her bedroom "she better come with some money cause ain't feeding her"

Jet stopped smiling

"hmm I hope your ok ed when I get there "

The message he got from wasn't from Ed. It was her father , he hasn't seen Ed since 5 months and she was missing . That was the reason he called Bob . He pulled some strings with his guys , found out that a Teenager with red hair named Jane was at a front foster home that sells teenagers for some dough most likely for crime syndicates brain wash em young ,

Jet thought that ain't Edward , well because Ed is..well Ed? Right. But from the info this girls gets pretty crazy if you touch her dog or computer , well that's all Jet needed to hear .

" But why would she call herself Jane ? Mmmmhhh"

Jet prayed to god that's she's ok he heard about these children retailers he couldn't wait to beat the pulp out of those freaks "dinnnggg"

Jet got up to check on his muffins my god he loved his cow baking equipment from bountys and home goods

"hmm almost done"

Faye closed her bedroom door and Locked it she went in her pillowcase and pulled out a box . She opened it and pulled out a picture . It was taken two years ago to be exact . It was the whole gang Her , Jet , Ed and ...

"Spike "

she barley hushed his name, she missed him a lot lately just when they became almost friends he had to go prove points and soul searching for the ice queen Julia ..ok she got killed and he loved her I'm not that heartless what was he supposed to do for a dead woman ? Be in hell together I don't get it . She looked at the picture again and thought about how diffrent everything was 2 years ago she used to wear that yellow outfit . She couldn't help but miss it Jet shrunk it by mistake

" what was I thinking ?"

She laughed , hell her ensemble didn't change much. She looked at herself thigh high black boots , denim shorts, a grey midriff top and a blue flannel shirt tied up ...yep if spiegel was around he would have a field day "once a slut always a slut " she laughed she wasn't a slut though more like a a kid trying to be a grown up . So what if I got memory's back and my past

"that's not me anymore ...I'm Faye Valentine..not ..Faye Akihito"

yeah she was a spoiled lil rich girl in her past life and now she eats like a bottom dweller in space with a ex cop who bakes muffins, yeah she has a gambling habit and uses sex for a weapon. but she lost a member of her second life family not only her first family but now this one. That's why she couldn't leave Jet . Oh hell When she left to find where she belonged oh dumb choice but that's me ..Faye always searching for her past life .Jet and Spike raked in some dough I could have swiped and left to be a wanderer. But I couldn't .

2 years ago

_**" leave Faye... Go I know you can't take it no more and I don't blame you live your life cause this life blows there's no life here , we just pass through a day"**_

**_Faye looked right at Jet "you want me help you with dinner ?" _**

**_Jet got up _**

**_"C'mon "_**

Faye was still staring at the picture. A whole bunch of freaks, the galaxy's hottest granny, a weird asexual teenage hacker, a ex cop who again bakes and takes in these freaks , and a ex syndicate member who dreams while living and lives while sleeping

_"And you have a future"_

Faye put the picture back and then layed down to sleep

"Goodnight Spiegel "

Jet: looks like the bounty hunters are back

Faye: I guess so giddy up partners

Next Episode Wild World


	2. Wild World

Wild World

"But if you wanna leave, take good care

I hope you have a lot of nice things to wear

But then a lot of nice things turn bad out there"

Hey Johnny good morning how you feeling ? "I'm living Rick give me the usual"

"well your the first youngin I know to make this concoction what's it called again ?"

"A prairie oyster , hurry up will ya"

"You got it, did you get in a fight again last night?

"No"

"Well I heard some raucous outside last night Libby told me it was a fight , started in New China Town ended up all the way across up here , I hear that a lot of damage took place ."

"Rick would you do your job please and fix the damn drink "

"Well I don't know Johnny sounds like you ..reckless take off your sunglasses

"Fine... Does that make you feel better ? "

"Few-we that's when you need steak most come in the back with me

"What happend Johnny ?"

"I did my deliveries as usual then some assholes tailgates me for five minutes it's all whole syndicate crap. for Christs sake two times this week for auto and ship parts I'm gonna get Chow and rip him out a new asshole . He needs to tell me when this jerks are watching me"

"Johnny I know you ain't delivering parts to ships and cars no more I'm not that old and chows a friend of mine why are you still doing this once you found out it's weed .I understood when you thought It was just mechanical parts but Jesus those syndicates well what's left of them since the war two years ago well they hate your guts why you still doin this ?"

" what do you think Rick ? the money's good it pays the bills"

"I know that but you hate doing it I see it on your face . why you all alone you don't got a girl or family kid?"

"Nope in my past lives I did , this is a new one where it's me all by myself to much drama "

"It gets lonely out there and from what I hear not just the syndicates after John Lennon."

"Why"

"Issp.. there sick of it ,the crooked ones wanna traffic the heavy shit"

"Rick I'm just a delivery guy I'm

Savin up to get my ship out of pound and I don't know maybe cruise the world "

"Yeah I hear ya watch yourself"

"I will Rick "

"I hope so Johnny"

"Jet are we there yet!?"

"Hold your horses Faye 5 more minutes and will be in your hometown"

" whoppdiddy fuckin do Jet maybe they will roll out the red carpet for me "

"I highly doubt that " Jet laughed

Faye sat next to him

"Hey Jet

"Yeah Faye"

"Do you miss him"

Jet looked at Faye with hurt he smiled a sad smile that truly showed his age

"Every freakin day, he was my partner on this ship before anyone , hell we had are times were he would tell me off and i would tell him leave but he always came back like the little kittens you leave milk too ... But what can I say he was stubborn and we couldn't stop him"

"Yeah I guess "

"Where here"

Faye and Jet walked out the ship to earth . Faye hated her life being on this planet, more so now cause she remembers how pretty it used to be , but there here to rescue Ed she could deal with it

"Here it is"

Faye looked up at the sign of the warehouse looking foster care

"Love and hope orphanage"

"Yeah lots of that, you armed Faye?"

"Of course"

"Well let's get this over with"

Faye and Jet walked in ready to get there crew mate back

_"It's all a dream ..."_

_"Hey your finally up ..."_

_"Doctor he's up finally .."_

Spike shot up woke from mixed dreams and scenarios from his past .

"Why do I keep seeing them , I thought I finally woke up "

Spike looked at the alarm clock , it read 5:05 am "

"guess I should start my day "

he went to the bathroom and washed his face as he looked into the mirror he saw his reflection , he was alive somehow one of his old red dragon buddy's Leo decided to take him to underground facility of black market medical care , he was out for three months , but when he opens his eyes there finally he realized it was all in vain. he didn't save Julia, he killed his best friend and left behind Jet and Faye god knows what happend to them and Ed . He wouldn't lie and say he didn't miss em but they wouldn't want to see him after all the heat he brought on them who knows if the syndicate got them . He prayed lately something he never did and he asked God everyday for them to be ok .

Spike started shadow boxing in his apartment he got this place dirt cheap for being right in New china town he stopped cause he heard someone knocking

Spike looked through peephole when he saw chow

"I should have known you you all people would knock at my door at 6 am "

Spike opened the door for chow , he was dressed to the max in a pink dress shirt his big rayban glasses and black slacks .

"What's crackin my dude I'm interrupting a rendezvous ?"

"No chow did you even go home yet ?"

"No we actually just stopped the party ! Do you know how fun it' is to sniff coke off a hookers ass ? We'll let me tell you raise the roof my friend yolo "

"Sounds disease ridden ... What's up?"

"Well Johnny I gots a lil problomo , I have to go to Venus pick up some cash and equipment and ..how could I put this the cops are looking to ransack so I brought 200lbs of my finest to your apartment "

" YOU WHAT!? No chow issp wants me John Lennon cause somehow I sighned up for this job as just a delivery guy for car parts and they want my ass now cause your too greedy "

"Johnny please c'mon do me a fave I got you new papers I faked your death at the morgue , I made spike Spiegel die for you c'mon help a brother out"

"Chow ...are you black mailing me ?"

" no never bro c'mon your my dude "

"Well you don't me that well as you claim to know me cause this is small fry shit trust me you know my past Leo must have told you "

"Yes I know this is kids shit you took Down Syndicates with Mao yen ri and vico..."

"Don't chow I'm not like that no more but I want money out of it "

"Of course how much"

"10 million woos"

"Oh Johnny your breaking my nuts"

"No deal then"

Spike was pushing chow out his door

"Fine fine 10 million woos but keep it safe no stealing from me Johnny or I will get you ok ..but feel free to light up one that's about it "

"Chow I don't do that now leave"

"You need to take some of that for stress of your to uptight"

" chow I'm in recovery I'm 7 months clean"

" ya I guess well I ll be back next week do me a favor to get in touch with Leo you might need to do some deliveries "

"You know I'm done after this right".

"I know"

"Hello how may help you two?"

Faye and Jet just looked at the sweet nun then each other , Faye was gripping her glock behind her back . she let go and put her hands down

"Hi I'm looking for Jane Myers"

The nun looked at Faye in her exposed ensemble and the scary looking guy with a robot arm

"Are you her guardians ?"

"No well" Jet started

"We heard from a friend that this place is a front and your cute nun act don't work on me I'm an ex cop now bounty hunter and I know that Jane is in danger and I will .."

Jet was still talking when the nun interrupted him

"Well mr. ...?"

"Jet .. Jet Black"

"Well Mr. Black I'm sister Annie and your friends little tip is wrong I rescued quite a few kids from those monsters and Jane was one of them. I will let you see Jane but if you really know her and I could trust you two cause I know your armed missy you don't hide it well" Faye cringed this sister Annie was a real bitch

"How do I know you two ain't gonna sell her on the black market?"

Fayes heart jumped . how bad is this world nowadays "listen Annie ...I mean sister we would never! ask us anything about her! We'll know "

Sister Annie looked at them

"What's her real name ?"

Jet looked her straight in the eye

"Edward Wong hau peppalu tirvusrky the ..."

"Alright then I didn't catch your name missy?

"It's Faye for your information "

"Mmmmhhhhm you must have got slapped by the ruler lots when you were younger , ever get caught smoking in the girls room?" Sister Annie said

Faye just stuck her tounge out at her "bitch"

"I heard that, follow me "

Jet and Faye followed Annie thank god someone saved Ed before something bad happend even though she is mean.

Spike was walking through china town after his visit from chow . So what if his apartment is filled with weed , in the microwave , stove, and shower . Spike cringed he needed a fizzy cow bull in the worst way . Gone was his blue leisure suit replaced with black slacks and a gray dress shirt untucked black boots and a cross at his neck ... Something he never took off during recovery , yeah he didn't go to church or confessed his sins he just never took it off. a girl at the rehab gave it to him her name was Catina , she was a Spanish beauty she had a little boy and she was addicted to meth..just like him expect she overdosed and died

_"Johnny take this"_

_"I'm not really a spiritual person"_

_"You need gods protection , your on your last life"_

_"No thank you I don't listen to women anymore but thanks anway"_

_"Take it farewell my friend "_

_"Farewell I'll see you at group in couple days .. Right?"_

_"Goodbye cowboy_"

Spike was brought out his daydream when he passed a Chinese medicinal herb/smoke shop with 3 issp spike thought he should listen in

"Hello gentleman how may I help you? " the little Asian shop keeper asked

"Cut the crap mr miyagi, we're not here for a mogwai "

"We're looking for John Lennon , not the Beatle the king of weed"

Spike was shocked cause he didn't make or produce he just delivered to the dealers why are they thinking he's the one cutting deals

"Officer I do not know what your speaking of I sell herbs remedys and fresh tobacco I do not deal in drugs "

"You mind if we take a look around?"

"Be my guest "

Spike knew this guy Miri was in on this he's chows uncle he alters the cannibus For a weird high spike knew he was in trouble "shit"

"Jane you have visitors can we come in?"

Faye Jet and sister Annie was waiting at door for a reply

"C'mon Ed it's me Faye Faye !"

"Then I'm totally not opening the door ! By the way it's Jane dumb ass"

Faye looked at jet shocked. "how is Ed not talking in third person and wouldn't she want to see us? Especially me I'm Faye Faye"

Jet started to scream "what did you's do to Ed ?! Ed would be thrilled to see me and Faye Faye ! I mean Faye "

Sister Annie couldn't help but smirk

" welcome to teenagers , sarcastic little heathens , jane come say hi to your friends "

"fine they better have like money or wifi for me"

Jet was bewildered now just as much as Faye

"What's up "

Faye and Jet just stood in shock, out walked a 15 year old Ed or Jane with mid length red hair Capri ripped jeans, a yellow hoodie and and make up

Faye was just shocked

"Ed are you wearing shoes?"

"It's jane dipshit and duh why wouldn't i ?"

"Why you little monkey I came here to rescue you cause your joke of a father lost you understand I could be playing Spanish 21 right now but I'm here on this shitty backwater planet where nothing good comes from helping ! "

Jet grabbed Faye before anything

"Now faye calm down Ed er I mean jane didn't mean it"

"I decided I wanna be ed again so what's up"

Faye thought she was gonna kill

"I know we should we should have left you you little bast..

"Now faye stop, so ed how you been ?"

"Alright I guess chillin here my dad lost me, I have ein doggy though um let me see that's it , I need cash though cause the new iPhones coming out so can I come back to bebop bebop?"

Jet was puzzled where was the sweet Edward who loved him and didn't care for materialism ?

"Umm sure ed we missed you by the way .. Are you ok ?"

"Yes blah blah blah c'mon in getting bored already hurry up let me get ein and tomatoe "

Faye was shocked she was more mean then her

"Um thanks sister Annie sorry for all the trouble " jet said scratching his head

"It's ok mr. Black I think she will be happy with you guys your all she talks about "

"Really she seemed pretty off about it ...wait if she told you about us?"

"Mr black she's a teenager she likes boys and all the hip things , her father abandoned her twice and she was rescued out of a bad place , that's why I have to go through extreme methods sometime ..plus I liked seeing you squirm mr black "

"Umm well um why thank umm sister"

" stop in sometime ...jet "

Jet had to admit for a nun she was pretty

"Yep she winked at you"

"Can it faye "

"You know it's a sin to lust after a nun"

"Faye be quiet !"

" ed and ein wants ice cream now losers"

"No Ed no pit stops we got someplace to go "

" why cause Faye Faye gained weight ?"

"You little shit "

"Ahhghg run ein !"

Jet was so happy ...if only old spike was here

Home is where the heart is ...

Ed: so next episode Faye Faye goes on a tragic seaweed diet and dies

Faye: no I don't stop listening to this freak

Ed: I'm not a freak your a freak cause ed is ed

Jet: next episode Santeria


	3. Santeria

Hey guys back with another chapter

I know some people might think this fic is crazy or occ , but I think a lot changed for the bebop crew . Yes in this fic Spike is dealing with substance abuse because of all he went through (plus I feel there was drug use in his syndicate days) and yes he's working drugs as well but you'll see why more in the fic . As for Ed yes she's acting different but she's also older going through a lot and feels the need to change . This is my first fic and I'm totally open to advice and suggestions ! But this is my take on a continuous of bebop, well one them so please review and give your insight :) sincerely Sammy

I do not own cowboy bebop or it's characters or the music I use in this story I own my cat, computer and husband ...

Santeria

"I don't practice Santeria, I ain't got no crystal ball

Oh I had a million dollars but I'd, I'd spent it all"

"Shit" Spike was pressured out issp was crawling all over the damn place . No way in hell is chow gonna answer his phone right now

"Dammit" Spike said as he was walking he looked like he was trying blend in the street with hands in his pockets and head low , he wanted so out of this crummy job , but was bounty hunting Better? Always broke , always starving , living with freaks

"Yeah freaks that I miss"

Spike sighed and finally understood what "freaks flock together "mean

"Buzz Buzz" Spikes phone started to vibrate he looked at the caller id

"Hmm chow"

Spike answered the phone

"Yo"

"Hey BFF what's up ?!"

Spike went into a alley so no onlookers could hear him

" I don't know chow I had a threesome with Asian and Spanish chick then we ate moo goo gai pan "

Spike screamed but low in his phone

"Really you have all the fun when I'm out town " chow huffed while filing his nails

"It's sarcasm idiot ! So why is Mars flooded with cops ?! Huh chow what's goin on that I don't know about? "

Chow told the strippers in the background to be quiet "

"Spike now don't be mad.. But we have teensy problem "

Spike was getting pressured out now

"And what would that be chow?"

Chow was blank for a good 30 seconds

"Well spike there raiding all my guys places shits hitting the fan they placed bountys on me , the Chinese mafias got it out for me I didn't know what to do " chow cried

Spike had knots in his stomach he could sure use a hit right now

"Chow which Chinese mafia? There's many syndicates ?!"

Chow had a big change of Tune

" the new rising red dragon "

Spike went numb, how ? he took down Viscous only Leo was left and went into hiding with his wife and kids on earth

"Chow there's no red dragons left

You off all people know that. Leo's

Your best friend"

Chow sighed "spike Mao yen rai had a son with some pretty young thing up in tj , they didn't start dealing till you left the syndicate, he was Mao's love child that went to the finest schools had the best , but never met his dear old daddy cause he got sliced by ..well you know who so he's out for revenge and he's trafficking meth and red eye , he's the one freaking about this "

Spike was confused

"If he's looking for revenge Vicious is dead , I killed him" spike said cold

Chow was getting to panic at this point

"Spike he knows Vicious is dead ... He wants you .."

Spike tensed

"But I didn't kill Mao and I'm dead in this world, what did I do ? "

Spike was really confused

"Well Mao spent all his time with you and also he left the red dragons to you in paper before Vicious flew the coop and went against the elders.. He's a messed up kid who wanted your past life and didn't rightfully get it he feels he needs to kill you to rightfully claim his throne or some stupid shit "

"But how does he know I'm alive and doing business with you !"

"Well let me tell you this his mothers brothers a cop for issp dug around my best doing to hide your ass and found out your still around and now he's after me and Leo so yeah "

Spike was in shock how long was gonna have to deal with this ? How many deaths , how many lives does he have to live , maybe just maybe in this one he would of like to traveled meet new people maybe have a normal life

"Spike you there?" Chow screamed through the phone

Spike sighed " so what now ?"

"Well good news is he can't do anything right now to you cause he's fifty fifty about you being alive from yours truly , the morgue has your death certificate and all so that's good but the new red dragons on the rise and they want us out so were gonna retire BFF "

"How " spike asked

"Well I got ten customers coming to get some and I got one guy who wants the rest of it he's name valoja, hell give us 100 million cool woolongs for all that in your house

Spike felt better now " ok chow call me with info later " spike hung up his phone he needed to get to a computer asap to read if what chows saying is true " I really hope your dead Spike Spiegel"

Chow was worried he liked Spike but what he's supposed to do he crossed the syndicates territory with the weed trafficking and what was he gonna do let them blow he's brains out so he thought of the best plan ... Tell them spikes alive not only Maos son Carlos want revenge but the guys who survived spikes bang bang party was after him too, some even just came out of prison and there savings eating up by issp , chow really felt bad " well hopefully he won't know there's a bounty on his head on his new alias , and he 'll get his money and go somewhere far " chow got up and turned to his strippers in hot pool "oh me so horny girls hot tub time !"

Jet was approaching Dohanns to get some info on this John Lennon guy he was about an hour away when he seen Faye sporting a blonde short wig with bangs a tank top rolled up to her midriff a blue mini skirt with black thigh high boots a beret and big black sunglasses . Jet started scratching his head while Faye looked in her compact putting on her red lipstick

"Ugh Faye don't take this wrong way but ugh why so dressed for Dohann?" Jet asked

Faye closed her compact and took her sunglasses off "well I'm gonna sleep with him so he could throw some artillery on my red tail "

Jet turned every shade of red you could think of Fayes really gonna sleep with Dohann ?

Faye started laughing while she stretched "no jet I got a lead from your friend Bob that John Lennons out doin runs today gonna try and bust that hippy " jet looked at Faye

"Since when does bob give you info and how are gonna know it's him huh Faye ? Sounds like your goin to sugar daddy at the ponies "

Faye grabbed a red coat an grabbed her ciggs lighting one

"Well for your information I showed Bob some cleavage when you went with Ed for ice cream , he called said he had info for you , just for you and you know after the girls made there appearance he sang like a canary the issp had a chick call one guy and said Mai ling would like to purchase some shit and set me up a date with himself the guy who makes the appointments for deliveries named roger so there gonna bust him afterwards so Jet do you believe me now? "

Jet just nodded his head " so what I'm I even going to Dohann for? "

Faye put her red coat on

"Well im taking my red tail to Mars I might not meet with John himself so get all the info you can , can't hurt see you later hopefully with a wad of woos " Jet turned around while Faye left " call me if you need backup "

Jet sighed guess he got stuck with the boring work

Ed walked in the front "hey jet were did Faye Faye go "

"She went to try and catch John , do me a favor kid you still hack ?"

Ed just looked at him then said "it's gonna cost you " Jets eyebrow twitched "how much kid " while pulling out his wallet

Spike was at his fave Chinese restaurant mr egg roll , they had the best egg rolls on this side of the galaxy plus it was a computer room Spike sat down at the computer pulling up info on spike Spiegel . It all led to dead, dead dead . How did this Carlos know he's alive he wasn't afraid of him but he was just getting sick of this cat and mouse shit . He started touching his cross on his necklace , lately he wanted to get high so bad. From the dreams of Julia , Vicious Jet, Ed and even that big mouthed shrew , god knows why he thought of her , they never got along , she would steal his money, food and challenge him to racing in there mono pods

_2 years ago_

_"C'mon Spiegel you afraid to play cards with me huh? Afraid to be beat buy a girl " Faye teased Spike smirked sitting across from her_

_"Well your definitely not a lady "_

_he laughed as Faye sat up on the couch_

_"spike you know I'm sexy I know you have a pathetic little crush on me it's so cute "_

_Faye mocked._

_spike scoffed "in your dreams Faye , your loud , obnoxious , you cheat, wherever you go there's a problem and you eat me under the table I like women not little tomboys playing dress up"_

_Spike said while shuffling the cards_

_Faye jumped and said "ha but you never said I'm not good looking now now did you spike , you just named flaws for like a realtionship , not flaws for sexual fantasies "_

_Faye had a smile ear to ear trying tease him_

_spike smiled_

_ "well i never said a I would kick you out of bed for a quickie Faye Faye " spike grinned then winked at her_

_. Fayes cheeks went red . she looked like a tomato_

_"Mmhmmmp ... Pig " she said stomping away_

spike was tugging at his cross reliving memories when his phone was vibrating again he looked at his phone "yo" spike said answering

"Yo John it's Roger you gotta do a deal in ten minutes at the Parisian market next to the melons "

"Roger I do deliverys at night whit a ski mask I can't pull those kinda moves you know that , go do the deal and meet up with me " spike said while typing

"No man i can't, issp is watching me like dogs in heat, they bugged my house following me and shit ! Am calling you off a pay phone man chow said just do it she wants a parties supply worth seven hundred thousand wongs , chow said keep 70 percent and don't worry ,

Spike wiped his mouth with napkin

"Give me the info " spike said

"Names Mai Ling , blonde wearing a beret and black boots , meet her in 20 at the Persian market near the melons "

Spike hung up the phone "sounds sexy " he took a last bite of his egg roll and headed out

Jet set the hammerhead down in front of Dohann's shop he walked up and knocked three times

"Coming " he heard energetic voice . "Hi can I help you " the young man opened the door with .

"Hi I'm jet black.. Is Dohann here" jet asked

"Oh sure let me take you out back I'm miles by the way " miles said outstretching his hand . Jet shook his hand

"Oh I remember you! Your spikes friend ! Remember we helped you guys out? How's spike by the way ? Is he here ?" Jet had a feeling this was gonna come up

"No um he left twos years ago haven't seen him since " jet said

" wow great guy too , where did he wind up going" miles asked while him jet walked through to get the back

Jet didn't know what to say he hated being the bearer of bad news

"We had a falling out we don't keep in touch " jet said

Miles looked at jet "well Dohanns right outback " jet waved at mile and said "thanks"

Jet seen Dohann working on rusty ass spaceship from underneath well, he seen his legs

"Dohann how are you buddy"

Dohann slid out from underneath

and

Stood up and wiped his hands on a old rag

"Hey how are you , mikes your name right? " Dohann asked confused

Jet laughed "no the names jet "

Dohann laughed as well

"sorry jet, forgive me I'm old , what can do for you ?"

Jet sat down on a crate box

"I need to ask you some questions about a mono pod called strawberry fields "

Dohann poured jet and himself some coffee

"Hell I should know I built the damn thing , how come spike ain't with you ? Your buissnes partners.. Right? " Dohann asked while placing a cup of coffee in front of jet.

Jet figured just come out with it , it would be unfair to Dohann he loved spike like a grandfather would .

"Dohann I don't know how to say this but"

just as he was about to finish Dohann cut him off

"So he never came did he ? God damn cat I thought he had some lives left in him "

Dohann took a sip of his coffee , jet was startled

"Dohann how did you know " jet asked

Dohann picked up his ciggerates and offered jet one , jet obliged and lit up himself and extended the lighter to Dohann ,

Dohann crossed his legs and took a puff

"Jet how do you think I knew spike ?"

Jet looked at him puzzled .

Dohann laughed

"you was a cop I thought you would have figured out that one "

Dohann took a sip of coffee and closed his eyes

"I used to work for the red dragons jet , that's how I met spike ... Well I was blackmailed they knew of my work when they first approached me I said no way I'm honorable man I don't want to be involved with blood money ...but they threatened my wife and daughter and I was forced ... But once my wife found out I was dealing with the red dragon she left , took my daughter liberty bell with her , she was five years old last time i seen her ...Noreen told me you will never see us again and if I tried she would go to the cops .. I told her it's for the better and I'm sorry , the sad part was to keep em safe I had to let em go " Dohann killed his ciggerate ,

jet was in shock who knew that Dohann worked for the red dragons he should of realized ,

Dohann had a sad smile on his face " i met spike when he was seventeen , he was a teenager in the brain but a 80 year old in the eyes when he wanted the swordfish I was shocked that's a grown folks ship but he told me thats what suits him , he was a good kid grew up to fast in a fucked up world he wanted a normal life , after he met that girl I knew he was screwed , but he left that life and I was happy for him thought he finally got rid of that past shit and settle down be a bounty hunter and I dunno he would find himself real soulmate "

Jet chuckled "spike told me his soulmate was Julia . hell Dohann he went in the lions den for her "

Dohann stood up rummaging through his drawers .

"That Jezebel wasn't his soulmate , loves not that miserable, she wasn't his fire she was plain.. To plain that it was deadly ...he needed life , a spitfire someone who was crazy as him like ...hmmm like that cute little coworker of yours in the hot pants , he should of gave her try "

Jet chocked on his coffee

"Dohann those to would kill each other on the ship , spike used to leave dead bugs on her bed play pranks on her , tease till she would give him a right hook "

Dohann laughed and sat back down , he handed jet a picture of spike .

Jet reached for it then looked at it , it was picture of Spike , Dohann , and miles

"Oh Dohann I can't why you giving this to me " jet asked

Dohann just smiled "I have lots of memory's of him , you deserve it you guys were like a family to him , spike looked happy when he was with you guys "

Jet smiled and put the pic in his back pocket "thanks man so back to business "

Dohann started working back on that rust bucket he was trying to make mint "well the ship strawberry fields 3790 was named after my favorite Beatles song , me and spike loved the Beatles he loved John Lennon the funny part was his yoko onoo did break up the group , but i never wanted to sell it had memory's for me , but this guy named Miri offered me a Hefty price so I took him up on the offer told me no books , cash under table that was a year ago . he lives up on Mars in New china town , he's got a shop up there .

Jet was rubbing his chin "did he say what he needed it for ?"

Dohann grabbed a wrench off his desk thinking "said he needed it to go back and forth to Venus to pick up herbs for shop

Jet smiled "bingo " he thought , jet knew Venus was known for home grown marjauna

"So why all the questions jet?"

Dohann asked Jet got up ready to leave

"well there's a bounty on this guy and he was seen delivering in that ship "

"Well I hope catch that bastard good seeing you Chris "

Jet just shook his head

"See ya Dohann"

Faye was at that god awful smelly flea market by the melons, she was getting aggravated that dumb ass kid said John would be there in 20 minutes.

"Damn hippys i should have known they would be smoking there own shit "

"Would the pretty lady like a melon?"

Faye was beyond pissed

"For the hundredth time no"

The vendor got up and put his hands on hips

"We'll move out the way your blocking my business !"

Faye grabbed the vendor by his collar

"listen Aladdin , no one wants your crappy fly ridden melons! Be quiet or you gonna blow my cover "

Faye let him go and bent down with her ass in the air pretending to be intrested in melons

Spike left his apartment already and was in the flea market , he was pressured out doing a legit deal with his face showing but he realized he's fuckin spike Spiegel , a bad ass who's smooth like water . Speaking of bad ass , all spike seen was a sexy one in black thigh high boots over melons looking at the fruit as if she was practicing karma sutra

"What a body " spike thought

Mai Ling a sex goddess on heels

Spike walked over to melons, Mai ling didn't notice him yet , spike thought maybe after this transaction

He could mix business with pleasure.

"So little girl I heard you want some candy " spike said looking the other way not to seem obvious

Faye was still looking at the melons the voice that spoke dripped sex but sounded really familiar

"Well daddy always told me don't take candy from strangers" Faye said seductivley

"Daddy's girl huh wanna come play with the big boys little girl"

Faye stood up and turned his way

"Not if your too rough ,be gentle on me tough gu... " Faye froze , she thought she was a seeing a ghost , she went numb

Spike turned to look at Mai Ling

"That voice is too familiar ..she sounds like ...

"Spike?"

Faye took off her sunglasses

"Holy shit it's faye " he thought he was frozen now ,he just hit on her , planned to sell her weed and fuck her brains out in his apartment

"Excuse me miss we were gonna have to place you under arrest for proustituing " there was about five cops coming to surround her

"You have to be kidding me right "

Faye screamed

"Yes officer she's proustituing in front of my business offering this man candy and sexual activities" the vendor screamed

"You Little melon freak"

Faye lunged at him

"The both of you are coming with us " one officer said

Spike uppercut one cop , another on came with a club and spike dodged him making him butt heads with another cop ,

Faye pulled out her pepper spray from god knows where and sprayed the other two cops in the eyes

"Faye c'mon run" spike screamed

they ran about 4 blocks till Faye sat down on the pavement taking off the blonde wig . Spike sat down across from her lighting ciggerete

" I would offer You one but I have one left .. I'll share it with you" spike said

Faye stuck her nose in the air

"I don't share with ghosts "

Faye said

Spike laughed

"I'm not a ghost faye "

Faye put her hands on her ears

She started singing "la la la I can't hear you ghost"

Spike offered her some of his cigg he knew she wouldn't refuse

"I'm not gonna catch like ghost herpes or something ? "

Spike smiled

"Nah we get tested in limbo every 6 months "

Jet was back at the bebop he walked into the living room and Edward was on the floor texting.

"Hey Ed , Faye call in ? "

"Ed...? Edddd!"

Jet screamed why wasn't she answering him

"Wait ...wait ..texting ...ping"

Ed looked up "no Fat piggy Faye fayes phone and comm is dead but she's fine she's a big girl"

Jet sat down and looked at Ed

"So what's this beef you have with Faye Ed ? You used to love her."

Ed stood up and sat next jet

"Hmm let ed see fat piggy Faye Faye told Ed find where you belong , Ed and ein doggy left the bebop went back to father person , he lost Edward and ein , Ed was in a black market children's lot where the sell you to drug dealers so Ed could sell drugs and kill people , they don't feed Ed or ein doggy they took tomato from Ed , then Ed went to sister Annie and it took jet person and fat piggy 2 years later to find me ..I left my favorite place had bad things happen and suicidal spike lunkheads dead .. Everything's different "

Jet was on the verge of tears , how did his dysfunctional family of freaks get crazier, poor Ed leaving and going through god knows what , Faye pretending she's fine but she's more of a bad girl in high school trying to be rebellious for attention ,

Spikes dead , eins peeing on the sofa every two mins then starts digging , and him well he just got so Lonley and bitter that he tried to stop caring . Jet grabbed ed in a hug

"Ed I'm so sorry i promise you this is your home you will always have food and shelter If I have to give my last woo long god damn it"

Ed giggled " ok jet ok " Ed looked up and smiled at him

"Listen Ed don't be mad at Faye , she just got her memories back and well she thought she had a family to go back to she thought she was helping you , her mind was not in the right place "

Ed started texting on her phone again "yeah your right I love fat piggy Faye Faye again"

Jet laughed "you better stop callin her that , she's gonna kill you "

Ed got up and was ready to leave

"Well sayonara eds out "

"We're you going kid ?"

Ed did a cartwheel " Ed has a date with yoshi her friend on twitter Ritter"

Jet was shocked "no you don't young lady you gotta pull up some info for this bounty"

jet said he's proud of his father figure voice

Ed started screaming "awwww c'mon jet please I'll die if I don't see yoshi he's my lamb to my tuna fish please we need to see each other before he's back to school "

Eds whining was ringing in jets ears

"Fine fine go but tonight it's buisness ed you want money you have to do your share "

Ed saluted jet "aye aye captain jet person !"

Jet was all by himself again well maybe he try that online dating site

Spike and Faye started walking spike didn't know what to talk about , so much happened yet he didn't know what to say .

Faye was creeped the fuck out he died they got phone call from the morgue she still believed like ten percent he was a ghost

"So" spike said

"Yeah " Faye replied she looked at him amazed cause he wasn't dead , the lunkheads alive and he looks good, ew did she really just think that ?

"You hungry valentine ?"

Spike asked , Faye's stomach made a gremlin like noise , Faye wanted to jump off the biggest bridge . what a crap out day

"Classy i got food at my place c'mon " spike started walking he turned around and seen faye still standing there

"Valentine I'm offering you free food this is a once and life time offer c'mon "

Faye walked faster to catch up with him

Spike opened the door to his apartment with Faye following him

Spike sat his keys down and stretched his back popped from all the stress lately

"Nice digs Spiegel , very modern "

Faye said while taking of her jacket

Spikes apartment was nice it was plain though, a sofa and and chair In the front , a tv with Bruce lee DVDs scattered around and that was it . Faye probably betted that he didn't even own a bed,

"It's ok , somewhere to put your head down at night" spike said

"Hey at least it's yours"

Faye said sitting down on the sofa while spike was in the kitchen fixing something

Faye's head was throbbing she wanted to ask him so many questions like how come he never came back, or at least tell them he was alive , why did he wanna be all alone plus on record he's dead. it made no sense

"Penny for your thoughts "

Spike startled her out of pondering questions holding two plates of jasmine rice and some kind of meat stir fry , spike sat on the chair and handed faye a plate and chopsticks

"I was just wondering when you learned how to cook" Faye said

Spike laughed

"It's pre made , microwave and eat"

Faye picked up her chopsticks and took a bite

"Not bad I have to tell jet about this" Faye said

Spike cringed, he forget about jet , and forgot about Faye being Mai ling , he better ask questions first .

"Faye what where you doing on Mars today at the flea market in disguise? Spike asked

"Oh shit!" Faye screamed

"What happened ?" Spike asked

Faye raked her hands through her hair

"I was on a mission spike, me and Jet's after this guy named John Lennon , it's hush hush bounty, bob gave the info to us and when I bumped into you , and almost got arrested I forgot I was supposed to meet him there, he was delivering me the product crap, it was money in the bag Jet'gonna kill me "

Spike was in the clear , she didn't understand what was up there

"Wow how much is he worth?"

Spike asked

"5 millions woos , a good price it was gonna help me and Jet"

Spike for some reason felt a pang shoot at his nerves , Faye and Jet were still partners even though him, and Ed wasn't there? Why would Jet let the lying shrew stay? The way she's talking as its as if they got close, really close

"So how is Jet?"

Spike asked

"He's ok we were doing good money wise, but it's been slow , a couple a months ago we went to that resort place mamboo on Venus, got a room had fun at the red sand beach ate lobster stew nows it's just living day by day"

Spike felt jealousy they got to have fun and live a life while he was here all alone

"You know Jet's gonna freak when he knows your alive I should call him where's my comm?"

"About that" spike interrupted her

"Don't tell Jet, you never seen me faye "

Faye was confused and angry why didn't he want jet to know he's alive and ok why is he being so weird did he really hate them that much?

" I don't get it spike? Why can't jet know ? Why didn't you let us know your alive? Huh !? Do you know how bad it was after you left!? Our crew was wrecked , Jet became numb and depressed he would clean things that already clean , for Christ's sake spike! He didn't even through out the ashtray with your ciggerete butts in it ...your room ...it hasn't been touched since you left"

Spike got up and put the empty dishes in sink walking past Faye

"You wouldn't understand"

Spike said

Faye got up following him

"Try me"

Spike slammed the dishes down

"Dammit Faye! ...when I left I had.

things I needed to finish ...things that you guys feel was frivolous but the needed to be done ...I died that day Faye ...a part me died when Julia was killed in my eyes cause of me...I had a love affair with my best friends girl ...I put that bullet through...her.

Faye was silent just listening to him with her eyes wide

"Then my second life's home is in shambles because I brought heat on them , Jet got shot . they were coming after me and I knew that day was coming ..secretly I wanted it come ...I wanted to wake up so fucking bad from that slumber I thought I was in."

Spike was now clutching the cross his necklace feeling jittery

"I killed my once best friend ...my brother, so I could wake up, I finally thought it was over I closed my eyes to only float through limbo , do you want to know what happened to me after that Faye ?"

Spike looked at Faye right in her eyes with with a sadisict Smile

"What" was all she trembled

"I woke up to live again, I rose from the dead because God don't want me and neither does the devil, I'm damned to live out another life I didn't want to live"

Faye wanted to cry never did she realize how messed up he was , he's angry cause he's alive and he's mad because people out there is happy about it.

"Spike c'mon your alive maybe your meant to live more , I mean look at me I'm technically 78 but I'm still 25 , why don't you come home spike? Come back with me Ed's back there too , you could help us catch this bounty ! C'mon it will like old times comrade !" Faye smiled

"No" spike said

"Why spike we need you " Faye pleaded

"I'm done with it faye this is my life here I have business to finish up and I'm gonna travel or do something with this life , plus you and Jet sound fine without me you guys are playing house well" spike said resentfully

Faye was angry now

"What the fuck does that mean spike , what are you jealous cause no matter how bad are situation is we get back up and deal with it?! You sound like a coward spike "

He didn't mean to be resentful but he was, it mad him angry that they had peace and it irked him that Faye and Jet got so close , but He guessed he felt that Faye was a fucked up girl that came out ok and is still standing, she had fire to live and a breathe life in her , anger and passion written on her, ha! He didn't know if he wanted to strangle her or push her on the kitchen counter and screw her till the the cows came home , that Mai ling thing really fucked his brain up

Spike started to massage his temples from Faye's screaming , when she stopped he his eyes caught her going towards the cabinet to get a glass he grabbed her arm and asked

"What are you doing ?"

Faye looked at him as if he was high

"I'm getting a cup for some water , I'm thirsty, let my hand go creep jeez you see me for an hour since two years and you can't keep yours eyes and hands off me " she smirked teasing him

"Stop it your being obnoxious , move I'll get it for you "

spike moved and pushed Faye to the side and so he could get her a glass , he couldn't risk her seeing the weed he had all over his house , his cover would be blown and he didn't need that with all the heat on his ass especially since Jet and Faye wants "John Lennon " aka himself , oh god the irony of it . what would faye do if she found it he was John , haul his ass to issp probably , no should wouldn't do that , neither would Jet . He had in idea he did Miss being a bounty hunter , plus he had nothing to lose he's wanted and John Lennon and spike Spiegel are too connected lately , no he couldn't put them in danger again plus eds back that's what Faye said earlier , last thing they need is a ex junkie on there ship.

"Spike ! Spike earth to spike ?! "

Faye said kicking him out of his thoughts again

"Here sorry about that"

He said handing her a glass of iced tea

"I won't tell jet , yet"

She said

"Good "

Spike said

Faye moved closer to him and reached her fingers to his cross

"You never seemed like spiritual guy spike " Faye said grazing her hands over the cross as she moved in closer to him

"I'm not " he said very low

"Why do you wear this then?" Faye was looking at his mismatched eyes searching him because he's different yet still the same or maybe she changed , maybe this was dangerous cause they never was this close to each other , Maybe this was a different life and she wanted danger

"Someone gave it to me, they told me to wear it everyday cause I'm on my last life , make this one count "

Spike said

"So what are you gonna do know ?"

She asked

He grabbed her by the hips and pulled her close to him , she was in shock. What was he doing

"Faye get down!" Spike screamed

As he toppled over Faye and gunshots rained down

Spike: they say let sleeping dogs lie

Faye: they say happiness cleanses the soul

Spike: what happens when your soul ain't worth saving

Faye: next episode Gimme Shelter

We'll tell me what you guys think ,

Sammy out:)


	4. Gimme Shelter

Hey guys back with another update !

I wanna thank megami_sama88 and Late night conversations for there reviews, getting props from these authors are amazing cause I'm a big fan of there work:) as to the readers this fic is going to get darker as well with dark humor. also I'm open to any reviews and any suggestions . Please forgive as well for some of the spelling and grammar errors in the previous chapters I'm doing this on mobile and my spell check wasn't working right, I will fix the previous chapters As soon I as I can ...Sammy :)

I do not own cowboy bebop, it's characters or the music in this fic I only own my cat , husband , and ein plush doll

Gimme Shelter

Ooh, a storm is threatnin'

My very life today

If I don't get some shelter

Oh yeah, I'm gonna fade away

"Faye get down!"

As he toppled over Faye gunshots rained down

Bullets poured through the apartment then stopped ...

Spike was on top of Faye on the floor glass and bullet casings was all over them

"Faye are you strapped?" Spike asked low in her ear

Faye just nodded

"Ok ...on the count of three were gonna get up and and draw our guns you have to be quick cause there's at least 7 seven guys outside , can you handle this ?"

"Yes"

"Ok ...1...2...3 GO"

Faye and Spike shoot up , pistols out ,

Spike grabbed Faye's arm tightly as they slowly walked to the bullet filled wooden door

"Faye you take right I'll take left "

Spike said. Faye creeped soundlessly to the right of the door , they both stood with there backs against the walls .

Spike checked his Jericho he was loaded , Faye had her glock ready checking bullet count

"Spike I only have 3" she mouthed

"Make it count" he answered back

As soon as he was reaching to open the door 8 men dressed in suits with a gold dragon pin on there lapel came bursting through the door cocked and fully loaded they looked at spike and Faye armed

"Well Well isn't John Lennon himself in the flesh , You been busting our balls for a long time now

looks like chow gave us the right address "

Faye looked at spike shocked what did they mean by John Lennon ?! They must have made a mistake Faye had to speak up

"You guys got the wrong address, he's not John he's sp-

"So you found me, what's up"

Spike spoke over Faye better for Carlos syndicate shits to think he was John and not Spike Spiegel Carlos was still digging around for Spiegel, so why not let him make John his priority.

"Well John you pissed some people off, you know it's nice to go around our are playgrounds"

"Sue me"

Spike mocked

"Oh we got a tough guy here huh?

Well how bout you and the missy do this the easy way, it will be quick and fast" said one thug

"Easy's not my style " spike said while pulling the trigger, he took out two guys in no time , Faye was covering him and fly kicked one of the chumps then shot him , spike dodged one with a knife , grabbed him from the back with a choke hold , while the man was losing oxygen spike grabbed the knife and stabbed him ,

Faye was down to two bullets and there was four guys left, she didn't know how her spike was gonna pull this off with one of them getting hurt

or killed

Spike did a sweep kick and got one of the guys on the floor , then kicked him in his face knocking some teeth out , Faye right hooked one and he just turned his face and smiled

"C'mon pussycat that's all you got ?"

Faye did a high kick straight to his face with her 5 inch heel, it went straight into his eyeball

He screamed in pain as she shot him in his leg ,

Spike knocked another two out but as soon as they hit the ground Faye screamed

"If you know what's best don't make a move or the lady gets a bullet through her pretty little skull " the last guy standing had Faye with a gun at the side to her head

Faye was hoping that all her faith she had in lunkhead would come through, he saved her once in a situation like this

"Who sent you, answer me that and you could both blow our brains out , I would like to at least know before I die " spike said with his gun pointed right at the man

"That's the stupidest thing I ever heard" the man laughed "what do you wanna do haunt him In the after life?"

Faye looked at spike as if "what are you doing!"

"So tell me who sent you , I know chow gave you the address , but who was it that asked" as spike was talking the red dragon chump didn't realize that he had his left hand behind his back holding something

"CARLOS GUERRERO , and he will be happy to know John Lennon is de-" BANG

Spike shoot him right in the head , Faye screamed from the blood splattering all over her

Spike threw the gun on the floor and cracked his neck , he was fucked

"What the fuck is going on spike ?"

Faye asked as she was hunched down as if she was gonna throw up

"To much.. You need to get out of here asap , is your red tail nearby ?'

"Yes but I'm not leaving till I get an explanation! I almost died from this I deserve it god damn it !" Faye screamed

"Please tell me your not John and you was bored and wanted fight some guys" she asked

"Faye I'm pretty sure you know the answer to this , your not that thick headed , and you need to leave now!" Spike shouted

"Fine I'll call the red tail for us and well had back to the bebop, it's docked on earth near Dohann "

"I'm not going just you , bring your red tail by the balcony too risky going in the hallway and downstairs "

"Are you shitting me ! There gonna be watching your every move ! Why can't you just leave?"

Spike grabbed a towel and wiped his face he had huge gash on his cheek a bullet grazed him in the cross fire

"I got some things I need to clear up then I'll see we're I need to go"

"Spike there's dead body's here your either gonna get killed or arrested , I advise you to screw whatever needs to be done and leave , will figure things out later" Faye said

"Faye you need to leave now it's not a request it's a demand"

"Fine...GO!" She screamed in her bracelet

Spike bent down and grabbed a gun and handed it to Faye

"In case you get followed"

"Thanks"

The red tail was at the balcony spike followed Faye there , Faye was going in her red tail till she looked back at spike

"Don't tell Jet ok?"

Spike said

"I won't jackass but.."

"But what"

"Is there anyway you could get In contact with me to let me know your alright?" Faye asked

"Yes"

"Watch yourself spike" Faye said as she closed her hatch and took off

Spike jumped the balcony and landed on a dumpster hitting his back

"I'm getting to old for this"

He sat up and checked to see if he had his gun on him, his ciggs, and his phone "check, check and check"

He took out his phone and smashed it on the ground , he didn't need anyone tracing him right now cause that incident earlier means shit hit the fan

But first he needed to see how far in this he was . He needed to talk to chow , then beat the shit out him

Faye was totally freaked , first with finding out spike is alive today, then the incident with those syndicate guys , add the cherry on the cake that spike is John Lennon the bounty they was after . that would explain the melon Mai ling episode god! She felt so stupid she didn't understand what was going on . One thing she did know was that he was in trouble

"What else is new"

Jet was was fixing his profile for grownfolksconnection .com

"Hobbies...gardening ,cooking...and sewing ...no too pansy sounding let's see "

Phone call ! Phone call!

Jet seen it was Bob he exited out his embarrassing website and answered

"bob what's up"

"Hey Jet I'm i catching you at a bad

time?"

"No ..not at all" jet said he was kind

Of more interested in fixing his

profile

Before the girls came home

"Well I got some crazy info for you, about an hour ago in new china town on Mars there was a gang bang shoot out , 8 syndicate members dead an old lady who lives 3 doors down heard the noise looked in and seen the mess "

"And your point is bob ?"

"Well the nice lil old lady was so worried about her dear next door neighbor John's well being she just had to go check cause he's such a nice boy "

Jet was now worried about Faye

"Bob my partner had a transaction to make with John today"

"I highly doubt she met with him, he never does the transaction that's why he's so hard to catch"

"Well did anybody get some more info on him?"

"No they sent a guy to clean up the bodies and leave , to much suspicion if they dug around for the neighbors to see, like I said issp wants this hush hush cause there in on it, they did find a shuttle ticket-stub that leaves to Venus tonight , my advice is you get your ass over there before the cops or the syndicate find him first"

"Well I'm waiting for my partners to get back , I'm docked on earth right now , ones on a date and the others comms dead thanks for tip bob, if you find anything out else let me know"

"No problem good luck jet"

Jet shut the computer off, wondering what happened to that shrew.

That's when he heard the red tail roll in

"Speak of the devil "

Spike was running through china town to get to that old man Miri's shop so he could get a air craft from him .

When spike reached the herbal shop he ran in only to find blood all over the floor and wreckage leaving jars broken with what seemed like as herbs and insects.

"Damn it"

Spike ran out the shop to the further slummier parts of china town , he knew they had pay phones there.

Just as he found one someone spoke up to him in the alley way

"Hey man , you look like you could use a hit "

Spikes head spinned as soon as hey heard those precious words to his ex junkie ears

"Yeah you totally need a hit my friend, I got 76% pure meth, you could smoke it, snort it , or shoot it right up" the drug dealer said tauntingly

Spike wanted it so bad , he could feel that high right now , not having to worry about Carlos Guerrero , or his partners on the bebop . He could just get high and be happy

"How much" spike asked

"Well depends my friend 400 woolongs gets you one crystal , if you give me 600, I'll throw in a syringe, all you would need is too heat it up on a spoon melt , it pour it over cotton-"

"I know how to do it dipshit , I know very well " spike said now he was edgy , months down the drain getting clean, the needle marks were starting to heal up finally but god he wanted to just shoot up and fly! Fly to no heartache and not understanding

your alive cause your to damn high to think .

"C'mon man I don't got all day 600"

RING...RING...RING...

Spike turned around , the pay phone he was right next to started ringing

RING ...RING

"Yo man forget about it " the drug dealer ran into alley as fast as he could

Spike decided to pick up the phone for some odd reason he knew it was for him.

"What the hell are you doing buying meth with all this heat on you huh? I should of let you , you little junkie shit"

"Chow you fuckin bastard what's going on ? You send syndicate members to my apartment to fucking kill me chow? And how did you know to call me right here huh? Spike screamed through the phone

"You know I have eyes in the sky spike, I had to give John up , spike they were gonna blow my brains out ! Plus I knew you could handle

it, I knew you would come out alive from that, that's nothing to you "

"Listen chow you need to be honest with me really whats the plan now" spike asked 10% thankful chow called and stopped him from going backwards his palms itched him so bad

"Well good news Carlos is on to bigger brighter things right now he's headed to Venus "

"Yeah I know , I left the stub out to sidetrack em" spike said lighting up a cigg

"Well good move , this it what your gonna do , leave Mars I"ll have ship waiting for you at 76th in Little Fuzhou find somewhere safe to go , buy a new phone and when shit cools down come back to your apartment I had one of my guys change locks and clean up , good move having that old lady call up issp to keep em moving my friend"

"Now remember the pics from the morgue I had sent around so everyone thinks spike dead ?"

"Yeah" spike asked fidgeting in the phone booth

"Well strawberry fields is in Venus , it crashed about a hour ago blah blah blah very tragic and shit so your clear on John Lennon "

"What about the body?"

"We had a willing victim.. His request was just deliver some money to his family , he was facing serious time any way, go spike don't worry John Lennons dead"

"Chow what about Spike Spiegel "

"I dunno spike but don't worry about that now"

"Later " spike hung up the pay phone and hailed a cab

Spike got out of the cab and seen his beloved swordfish waiting for him he couldn't believe she was standing there in all her funky glory

"I missed you so much baby..I know I know daddy's back " spike said as he was caressing his ship , it was to long they were separated, Spike jumped in and checked his compartments and found his gloves, while slipping them on he noticed a note for him

"Spike, sorry about all this bullshit for my wrongs I got this piece of shit out the junkyard for you , lay low, keep guard and stay classy, hopefully we could finish our little biznatch Chow "

Spike teared up the note tossing it out , he did trust chow, as far as he could throw him that is, but he was a good business partner , and he gets him out of a lot of sticky situations .

Spike took of , his plan was to go to Ganymede it was safe there , no red dragons, no John Lennon buzz and no beboppers . He seen Faye and she'll keep her mouth shut , he was sure of that, and like Jet would believe what that lying snake would say? He was clear clear of everyone and his past, for now he didn't now no one it's better this way

"Faye why are you covered in blood what the hell happened?" Roared Jet

"Your dripping it all over the floors I just mopped wench!"

Faye ignored Jets banter and flopped on the sofa leaning her head back

"So how did everything go, I'm guessing cause your Lady Luck in the flesh you didn't catch him right? Too busy galavanting around Mars till you got in trouble right ?!" Jet nagged

Faye lit up a ciggerete then started making o's out her smoke

"Case closed Jet , give it up we're never gonna catch this guy he's too good , let it go"

"The hell I'm not ! We need the money if you haven't noticed there's no food , the ship needs work and maybe I would finally like to enjoy myself instead of looking after a bunch of circus freaks !" Jet shouted

"Well I'm out" Faye said crushing her ciggerete

"Well I just got info from bob that John's apartment got raided by syndicate scum , he took out 8 of them leaving a stub to a shuttle to Venus "

Faye's stomach was doing flips Spike did not want Jet to know he was alive and she was pretty sure he wouldn't like Jet meddling in his new life as John Lennon , damn bastard couldn't of just came home , had to be all righteous and independent . Faye remembered his cross he wore at his neck , it was confusing yet it intrigued her so much

"So as soon as Ed gets back were off to Venus I was thinking maybe ed coul- "

"Jet how sure are we spike died" Faye asked cutting Jet off

Jet let out a sigh and closed his eyes . How many times were they gonna go over this ? She was at Mars today and got false hope

"Faye you and I both know he's dead we recieved pictures from the morgue ..to identify his body"

"Yes I know that but things can be covered up Jet its not hard if you know the right people" Faye said while grabbing some vodka from the shelf and a glass with ice "want a glass ?" Faye asked Jet

"No, I'm fine..why are bringing this up again Faye , I thought we've been through this, what's making you think differently all of sudden " Jet asked confused

Faye tossed her drink back still not answering Jet

"RING RING PHONE CALL PHONE CALL RING RING PHONE CALL "

"You gonna answer that Jet ?" Faye said Pouring herself another glass

Jet went to the PC and seen it was Bob , a double phone call in one day something's up , Jet answered worried cause he knew bad news was coming

"Hey Jet I got some crazy news for you , might not like it " bob said while eating a meatball sub

"What is it Bob " Jet was disgusted cause of the marinara dripping into bobs mustache

"Well cancel your plans to Venus ..Lennons dead , his aircraft got into a nasty accident Flames and all , it's like a legend died all the teens are balling there eyes out cause there king of maryjane died"

Fayes hand shook around her glass so bad that it was shaking on the counter loudly, she couldn't believe he died again ! That bastard why why did she have to see him again and share a last supper and talk about life and the realms of it.

It was like really seeing a ghost

"Well thanks again Bob , looks like I gotta fish for another bite"

"Sorry Jet see ya around "

Faye thought she was gonna puke

"Faye what's wrong ! Please tell me , if you tell me I could help you" Jet said he was worried cause Faye looked as if she was gonna pass out any second

"Listen faye I know it's hard , but after the red dragon headquarters massacre and the autopsy came back it was him , I had bob check around for me "

Faye wanted to punch Jet in the face if she had woo longs in the amount how much faith Jet had in that creep bob she would be millionaire

"Jet maybe he didn't want us to find him did we ever think of that?"

"Faye you can't keep doing this it's not good for you " jet said sympathetically

"Well he's gone again so.." Faye said while shoving a another shot of straight vodka down her throat

spike was flying in his swordfish reaching the end of Mars to the gateways to get to Ganymede . He was happy his plans were coming through but at the same time he couldn't believe he got approached by a dealer , he wanted that fix so bad since the past two days, 7 months clean but he still craved it , he knew he would for a while but as of right now he wanted to get high and stop living , he felt like a fucking coward for living , he ventured to die then rose from the dead , why did he need to be here at least when he was high he would forget his tragic life . Seeing Faye didn't make it any better,

"Boooooom"

Spikes swordfish leaned to the side and shook"

"Shit looks like I got some company"

Spike said gaining control

He seen three zip crafts loaded with with the whole artillery

"Well the if the Calvary wants to dance , let's boogie "

Spike lit up a ciggerete ready to roll

He shot at one to clear his way, two kept there distance as backup , Spike tried to dodge and shoot

"Who the hell are you guys?"

Spike asked he was confused red dragon thinks Lennon was burned to a crisp, why would they tail him

"We know your a narc you piece of shit, your backup called while you were undercover, shitty move man looks like we gotta dispose of you "

One guy said

"I'm not a narc you dumbass"

Spike said angrily he didn't have time for this crap

"Oh yes you are jimmy said you were feeling him out and then a payphone rang were not stupid"

"Fooled me"

Spike murmured

"Let's do this fast Fatty I wanna go watch the midget wrestling match at Far East "

"You got it Wilson"

"I really don't have time for this guys but I don't mind seeing you try your best" spike said

spike dodged and flew , till they reached the hyper gates he took out Fatty and Wilson, he was in the clear , so he thought just as the other zip craft came in to view it shoot at the the wings of the swordfish then it hit the thruster

"Shit c'mon baby c'mon "

Spike pleaded

Gravity took it's toll and Spike started to plummet into a hypergate for Earth

Spike zipped threw hypserspace with his ship in smoke , with the gravity and speed his whole body hit the front of the console . He felt a sharp pain in his side hey was cut up from the controls , they sliced him like fish.

Spikes ship was smoking as soon as the hyper gate reached earth , this was it he was gonna die. His ship would either catch fire or crash so hard the glass would impale him

"Whatever happens, happens"

He said closing his eyes

His ship crashed right into the sandy earth , the swordfish was to it's side while spike crashed he hit his head and broke the glass of the ship. his head was spinning and bleeding that's when he totally went black

"Ein doggy c'mon I want go back to bebop bebop ! Tinkle tinkle and well go home "

Ed just back from her date with yoshi , it was so romantic they went slimy buggy bug hunting with there hunter doggy ein, they examined slimy creatures then yoshi had to leave. Oh the pain of love

Ein perked up his ears and started barking

"What is it ein? More freaky insect creatures ?"

Ed asked

Ein started running and barking

"Wait up ein ! Wroooommmm wait for Ed !"

Ed stopped running when she see ein stopped and the data dog continued to bark more

Ed couldn't believe it , it was lunkhead spike persons ship. She ran over to it to find spike upside down bleeding and unconscious. Ed was examined him then started pulling him out

"C'mon spike person get out " she said dragging him

Ed dropped him on the floor dusting her hands off and kneeled down to look at him

"Hmm I wonder... Is he a zombie ein cause spike person died right? "

Ein barked and ran up to spike licking his face

_"What do you want Faye ? " spike asked they were at his apartment like earlier_

_Faye sauntered over to him then pushed him on the couch_

_"I want you to fuck me till I can't open my big mouth no more cowboy" she said then started licking his face_

"You got it " spike said dreamily

"Look ein spike zombie is alive!"

Ed squealed

Spike opened his eyes to see ed looking at him and ein licking his cheek

"stop you mangy mutt"

spike looked to the side

"Ed is that you, ? you look different "

Spike asked still to weak to move

"It's been awhile lunkhead c'mon let's get you back so you don't bleed to death "

"Faye I want this crap done with , Spike's dead that's it ! No more, what good is it gonna do to keep question if the freak is still alive were only fooling ourselves" Jet screamed

"Your right Jet " Faye said dryly

"I know I'm right we just have to let this go . He's never gonna just walk in and say something sarcastic like as if nothing ever happened "

"Hey Jet person! Hey fat piggy guess who Ed and ein found ?!"

Ed shouted walking in

"Stop calling me that brat! I'm not fat ! " Faye screamed

Ed stepped to the side so someone could walk in

Faye dropped her glass and Jet stood mouth opened wide

"Hey Honey I'm home "

Spike smirked then fainted

Never say never

Faye: I guess miracles do happen

Jet: yeah but where there's smoke there's fire

Ed: Fire in the hole!

Spike: next episode Solsbury Hill


	5. Solsbury Hill

Hello readers back with another update I hope you all are enjoying one of my takes of Spike coming back and reuniting with the crew . Please review and tell me how you feel about it , all reviews and comments excepted :)

I do not not own cowboy bebop or the songs mentioned in this fic . I only own my cat , husband, and my anime collection

Solsbury Hill

My heart going boom, boom, boom

"Hey," he said, "Grab your things

I've come to take you home"

Yeah, back home

"Hey Honey I'm home "

Spike smirked then fainted

"He's back!"

Ed shouted

"I'll be damned" Jet pinched himself to see if he was dreaming, nope he was up

" Jet let's bring him to the sofa, he looks pretty messed up" Faye said

**"What are you gonna do ? Just throw your life away as if it ****was nothing?"**

**"I'm not going there to die , I'm going to find out if I'm really alive. **

**I have to do it Faye"**

"_We only said goodbye with words_

_I died a hundred times_

_You go back to her_

_And I go back to..." _

Spike awoke to See Faye smoking siting cross legged and singing on the chair looking into space . This was a very cryptic déjà vu he thought , well the funny thing is she does sing beautiful

"Looks like the prodigal son is up"

Faye said getting up from the chair.

she checked his head to see if he still had a fever

"What's a prodigal son?" Spike asked sitting up the best he could his ribcage was bandaged and his left side of his head

"It's a story from the bible , he left

To spend his wealth and inheritance , he spent it all and starved , his father always awaited his arrival "

"Did he ever go home?"

"Yes , because god told him to, the father of the prodigal son made a feast for him because he was lost and now he is found"

"Wow didn't take you for a Christian Valentine " spike said smirking he knew that would piss her off

"And I didn't take you for a crappy drug dealer either Spiegel "

He should of seen that coming

"So spike I thought you didn't want Jet to know you was alive? Was it because you were our bounty ?" Faye asked

"Where is Jet by the way?"

"He's sleeping he was pretty freaked out your alive after we fixed you up he knocked out" Faye said

"So I'm guessing you told him you seen me today " Spike asked

He was nervous about Jet knowing his secret, also cause He told Faye not to tell him he was alive

"No.. I'm waiting for you to do that, I will also video it so I could always watch Jet shit his pants, he'll probably have a stroke too"

Spike couldn't help but laugh at that one

"I'll explain everything tommorow , to you too, you deserve it as well so does Ed" Spike said

"Yeah yeah so did you come back cause you missed me " Faye said seductivley sitting next to him propping her feet up on the table

Spike propped his feet up as well

"Like a fly misses a pile of shit " spike smiled

Faye made a sour face

"Haha Spiegel your so funny ...So are you in serious trouble ?"

"No I think I'm good right now but I'll deal with it when the time comes"

"I guess , I still can't believe I didn't understand you were John Lennon back at the market , ha! I thought you was looking to get some " Faye laughed

"Yep that was it valentine you could be pretty thickheaded sometimes "

Spike wanted to find the biggest hole and crawl in it . It wasn't that Faye was ugly you would have to be blind to think that , she was sex on heels, plus the way she looks now after two years with her pulled back like that and those boots, she was the hottest old lady the galaxy's ever seen, don't forget she had that Asian blood in her, but she can't know he thinks that of her plus when she opens her mouth it's done. that's what he keeps telling himself anyway

"Burp"

"Wow those nachos killed me"

What a tomboy Spike thought

"Well I'm going to bed smell you later" Faye said going to bed

"See ya Faye " spike said

Faye was at her door, she smiled happy he wasn't there to see it

Spike laid back down putting his arms in back of his head . Yep here he was back at the bebop. guess he was bound to come back to the yellow sofa and freaks of nature . He didn't want to be here but at the same time it felt right . He was gonna have to explain everything tommorow . Well at least he's Spike again , but that's a hard pill to swallow when you don't even wanna be alive.

With that his eyes finally drifted shut

"Wakey wakey eggs and bakey for

zombie drug dealer spike!"

Spike opened his eyes to see Ed looking down at him hanging of the sofa like a monkey

"Ed quit it ! Now, I would like some

privacy with Spike " Jet said

walking in the living quarters

"Uh oh looks like your gonna get it Spikey dikey " Ed said scurrying off

Jet sat down with two plates of

scrambled eggs, toast and bacon

"Eat, I gave you some antibiotics last night for that mean cut on your hip"

Jet said folding his arms

Spike threw the blanket off him and sat up . His head felt as if a semi hit

Him

"Umm thanks old man.."

"Don't old man me Spike, don't you dare play this off with some sarcastic crap you pull" Jet roared

"Look Jet I know your angry but you know what I had to do and.."

"You think I'm mad about that? Hell I tried stoping you, so did the damn harpy. Do you know what I dealt with after your soul searching spree!"

"It wasn't like that Jet you have no right to question that" Spike gritted he didn't need this right now

"I'm speaking right now, you could talk when I'm done punk" Jet said coldly his cop stats were really shining now

Spike wanted to say something but he might as well not . Jet was never this angry

"I called every guy I knew to see if maybe, maybe you were still alive. Cause I still couldn't believe it after I seen pictures that I know now are fake I decided to let it go . I gave it up. Helped Faye get on her feet cause her memory's just came back and her mind was haywire "

Spike started on his toast while Jet continued

"So we moved on , made some money and fixed her debts. Day by day living and trying to forget"

Here it comes again Jet and Faye's new relationship, so he helped the Romani fix her debts. Guess they really are playing house.

"So you walk in like nothing has ever happened . Not a phone call or for Christ's sake a letter Spike . Why now ?"

Spike could see the hurt in his friends eyes . He didn't mean to crash on earth, he didn't mean to meet up with Faye on a drug meet. Shit he didn't mean to come back here at all. He wanted to just vanish, that's what he really wanted, but it felt good to be back at the bebop. He would make things right with them, but this Jet and Faye bonding thing they had was still pissing him off.

"Looks like you guys were fine without me, well you and Mrs. Robinson that is"

Spike said jealously

"Me and Faye's relationship does not concern you. You lost that privilege of being a part of us when you left two damn years ago"

"Your right. I left to die but only to be mocked and still live ..I wanted to get in contact Jet but I did some stupid shit ... And I started dealing weed as a favor under the name John Lennon "

Jet was shocked..Spike was Lennon

"Click"

"Oh my god Ed keep snapping . He's got stroke face" Faye chuckled

"I can't believe it Spike, but didn't Lennon die in a crash , and Faye had a meeting with...Faye!" Jet screamed looking at Faye and Ed at the top of the stairs

"Well I'm gonna leave your guys little Boy Scouts meeting now" Faye said nervously

"Oh no you don't wench ! So you did meet up with Spike huh?"

"It's not her fault. I told her not to tell you . I had to much heat on me from the new red dragons" Spike said

"Hey ! Ed was left out of the loopy loop too" Ed said while texting

Spike told his ex crew everything from the hospital scene of Leo helping him to live . To meeting Chow and burning Spike Spiegels life away, then returning the favor of being his dealer and the new red dragons . He did leave out how he met Chow and his recovery of meth. He couldn't share that yet

"Wow Spike..I don't know what .."

"I know it's a hard pill to swallow Jet I promise in a couple days I'll get some woolongs together and fix my ship I'll be out of here" Spike said

Faye and Ed just looked at each other hoping Jet's fatherly instincts would kick in

"What makes you think there's no place for you here , your room is still your room Spike, this is my ship and I make the calls, this is your home as well"

Ed gave Faye a Twinkie cause she won the bet of Jet using that line

"I can't Jet . It's great offer but I'm not that guy anymore "

"C'mon Spike " Faye and Ed said in unison

"Spike listen to me it may not be great but no matter what you have a home here " Jet said

"I know , and sorry about everything Jet I didn't mean..."

"Invoice to bebop she bop" Ed sang

Everyone gathered by the vid screen

"To whom it may concern, there has been wreckage to the home of Henry Woods as of yesterday . As seen it was damaged by a space craft reading 972165 , last docked at fishing ship 491539 The bebop , Owner Jet black . Mr. Woods has begun claim for the amount of 2.5 million woolongs . For wreckage and pain/suffering . If not presented in 2 weeks amount will double and possibility of arrest will occur. I his lawyer Mira Sarin will meet with you for a recorded statement in 2 days

sincerely Attorney

Mina Sarin "

Ed read

Faye Ed and Spike just looked at Jet to see what his reaction would be

"I don't understand how they could sue you if rocks rain on this crappy planet every other day" Spike said casually

"Cause meteor showers are a act of God Spike! Crashing a ship on a house doesn't count!" Jet screamed

"Ed gave nice man Henry bebops info " Ed said smiling

"What! Ed why would you do that!" Faye said while grabbing Ed by her shirt

"I thought I taught you hit and run! Hit and run!" Faye shrieked shaking Ed

"Enough...If I don't pay this I mean if Spike don't pay this I'm getting locked up" Jet seethed

"Yeah and bounty hunting has went

to shit " Faye said letting go of Ed and grabbing a cigg out of Spikes pack

"Those are mine , lay off"

"Bite me Spiegel "

"Ew and catch one of your sexual diseases ? I'm good"

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

"It means you have either Chlamydia , herpes, Gonorrhea-"

"Herpes burpees slurpees"

"Woof!"

"SHUT UP all of you !" Jet screamed at the top of his lungs

Ed stopped dancing , ein let out a whimper, and Faye froze on top of Spikes back

"Good, So Spike any ideas how your gonna fix this?" Jet asked

Faye climbed off Spikes back and stuck her tongue out at him

Spike flipped her the bird and winked

"Well if you don't have any ideas looks like your stuck here for a while old pal " Jet said squeezing his shoulder leaving the room

Spike had a crazy idea rush in his brain . He did have lots of maryjane at his apartment that still needed to be sold . Yeah he would have to pay for the law suit and split his share from chow with the bebop crew. The greedy demon Faye would go for it , Ed well ..Ed is Ed . The ex cop was the one to worry about. Fuck it

"I have idea to fix this and make a good profit" Spike said smiling

Let bye gones be bye gones

Jet: nothing good ever comes from ideas by my partners

Spike:c'mon you didn't even give me a chance Jet

Faye : If I have to be a undercover stripper again I'm out!

Spike: Well we had too , considering your background and all

Ed: let the ice bucket challenge begin ! Ed nominates Ein doggy!

Jet: outside with that bucket Ed ! Right now

Faye: Next episode

Welcome to Paradise

I know it's a short chapter but I promise the next one is good ! Oh if any are wondering what song Faye is singing in the opening it's "back to black " by Amy winehouse . I feel it's Faye's song when spike leaves to meet Julia


	6. Welcome to Paradise

Welcome to Paradise

**"Some call it slums, some call it**

**nice. **

**I want to take you through a. **

**wasteland I like to call my home **

**Welcome to Paradise "**

"I have a idea to fix this and make a good profit" Spike said smiling

"Really ? How much profit we talking?" Faye asked sitting next to Spike

"What if I told you could go to the ponies and casino everyday for a long time" Spike said grinning

"Well you would do it to get my hopes up with no such thing " Faye pouted

"Why never my dear" Spike grinned

"What you got a bounty for us Spike" Jet asked

"Well no it's kinda of in the sales department" Spike Said

"Oh no ! If it's that escort service idea you had one time I'm not doing it" Faye huffed

"Hey I said meet them , put the guys to sleep and steal there money , I didn't say sleep with them ..but knowing you.."

"You wanna ad some more injuries to the list Spike-o"

"Let's hear em out Faye , How much we talking Spike " Jet asked while sitting down "

"100 Million woolongs "

"What!" Jet, Faye and Ed screamed

"Yep.. Take out the money for the claim"

Jet bit his tongue

"That would leave .." Spike was trying to count on his fingers

"9,999,997.5 woolongs!" Ed Calculated

"Divided by 3.." Faye said

"Umm Four Fat Piggy" Ed laughed

"You really need to stop calling me that! I'm not fat!" Faye shrieked

"I dunno Faye Faye , looks like you put a little on" Spike laughed

"I'm gonna ignore both of you's , how much divided by four then ? Faye asked

"Drum roll please" Ed sang

They just looked at Ed

"Fine without the cost of damages"

"I'll take that out of my share " Spike said

"25,000,000 million woolongs a piece"

Ed sang

"Oh my god ! I could do so much with

that . I could fix the ship real nice or take a vacation " Jet said

"I could go to the Galaxy Fair with Yoshi and buy a lifetime supply of cotton candy, and buy Ein doggy a diamond collar!"

Ed said dreamily clapping her hands together

"I could eat lobster everyday , and gamble everyday, and buy materialistic things that I love! Oh my god Spike your amazing " Faye squealed while she hugged him She didn't realize her boobs where pressed up against his face while she wrapped her arms around him speaking of lobster and ponies

"Uh Faye please get off me ..FAYE!" Spike screamed. it's not that he didn't enjoy it, he enjoyed it to much . He felt like a pervert , he needed to get some bad if Faye of all people was turning him on

"Sorry" Faye blushed realizing that her assets were in his face . She would tease him later cause by the looks of it down south he was like a horny 14 year old boy

"Well we know the pay but what's the Job" Jet asked

This was the hard part explaining what to do ...and steal a Drug Lord

"Well you see I have 200 pounds of weed at my apartment as we speak"

"Oh no ! I'm not dealing or delivering

drugs no ifs ands or buts about it " Jet said getting up from the sofa pacing

"Oh c'mon Jet hear the guy out ..I mean that's a lot of cash " Faye got up following Jet

"I'm on your side" she mouthed to Spike

"How are gonna do this Spike? Issp is rapid right now " Jet said pacing

"Well I was thinking in a week we could pick it up from my apartment , load it

on the bebop go the buyer who wants it. Piece of cake "

"Ok but is this your weed to sell?" Jet asked

"Well that's the problem we kinda would ..how do I say this.. Doing the

transaction without my business associate's knowing" Spike answered meekly

"Then definitely no! I'm not risking my life for this. Do you know what could happen to all of us?!" Jet asked

"It's money in the bag Jet . We can't worry . " Spike coaxed

"I have a lot to worry about buddy I'm getting sued, if I don't pay up I'm

facing prison time cause of you I might add , plus if I do say yes to this little Heist you got planned what assurance can you give me "

"Whatever Happens , Happens"

Spike said grinning

"Told you He would say that , pay up " Ed said holding her hand out to Faye

For a month old Slim Jim

"That's not good enough I'm out" Jet Said leaning his head back on the sofa

"I would totally still be in if you need me , you are looking very good today I might add Spike " Faye said huskily

"Really? I have been working out a lot lately "Spike answered flexing to show off

"Oh yeah, your triceps look great very sculpted . Boxing?"

"More from push-ups" Spike gloated

"Oh"

"Ed wants in to Spikey! Ed needs money for dates and and slimy bug farms!"

Jet thought he was gonna have a aneurism from them

"Well whoever lives on this ship isn't allowed on this deal . Spike isn't moving back in so he could do as he pleases" Jet grinned

"Really old man? Sorry to tell you this but I'm my own boss " Faye huffed

"Well you live here rent free so what I say I goes. That's for you to Ed"

"What crawled up your butt butt and died this sunny day Jet person " Ed said

"I can't vouch for Ed but has your word ever stopped grandma over here"

Spike laughed "Your right about that" Jet sighed"So what's the plan we could sure use the money "

"So your in old man ?" Spike asked

"Does it look like I have a choice ?" Jet replied

"Well were gonna have to wait a week to go to my apartment let things cool down. I'm gonna get the info from my partner were the buyers located, then go in as a team , sell it , get the cash make our way home richer and deal with the consequences after" Spike proclaimed

"It sounds like a great plan but what about the guy were stealing from?"Faye asked

"Well my half is 50 so im on only screwing him out of 50 too" Spike said

"Hmm I would be pretty pissed about 50 million Spike" Faye said

"Yeah I guess your right . We ...could split my share , I would need help on this this one, if you guys still wanna do this " Spike offered

"Well its not as much but the safety of it is alot better" Jet said

"Whatever as long as we get some dough I'm in" Faye piped

"Ed's in too fair share " Ed sang

"Why are you all of a sudden fair share for hitting some keys on a computer"

Faye spat

"Neow?"

"Hey were gonna need her hacking and acting skills , remember this ain't bounty hunting "

"I know that but c'mon shes just a kid"

"Don't worry Faye Faye I'll take care of you I know your hungry and all"

Spike laughed

"Arrrggghh ...Fine 12,500,000 a piece right " Faye asked

"Yep well do this a week from now till then guess im crashing here"

"Well since your gonna be here Spike-o , any possibility you'll go after a bounty with us if one comes up that is ?" Jet asked

Spike was contemplating his answer . He did miss it throw in some extra cash would be great they sure could use it for there upcoming business. Why the hell not

"Im down . We need money for our trip and supplys."

"Well Ed start tomorrow looking for a bounty cause we got are old pal back"

Jet said proudly

Yeah old friend back, Spike thought he wasnt the same guy . He was praying that old habits wouldnt come back especially being here .

It was already late on the bebop Spike just slept off the wounds from the previous day. He woke up at 3am looking at the swishing fan on the ceiling. Yes the damn swishing fan of memories of tracking down bountys to them failing and eating bell peppers without beef. "Julia" he whispered . All those fruitful moments of maybe hoping they would be together only to end despair. In the back of his head he knew the countdown would begin of them dying. But he was still here as if the devil and God was laughing at him and giving each other high five cause Spike's still breathing . He realized he was up now and decided to explore his old home.

Spike got up from the sofa wearing a old white t-shirt and black drawstring pants. they were his old workout clothes but they smelled washed , Jet probably did that.

He walked though all the chambers of the old fishing ship till he reached his godforsaken destination. His old room, he didnt know why but he had a swelling feeling in his chest when he thought about going in there. He felt as if he was invading someone else's privacy. Was this still his room? He thought . Whom the hell is he anymore . "Stop being a pussy Spiegel " he said out loud and and pressed the button to his old life

When he walked in it was as if he never left two years ago . His bed unmade , a bottle of Jamieson whiskey with a glass next to it with dried up alcohol in it molding at the bottom, a ashtray filled with the butts of ciggerates, his ciggerates marlbro red, and finally his eyes drifted to rag he polished his Jericho with that faithful day. he leaned his arms on his old dresser cause all of this crap was to much for him

_"Not one picture" _he thought . Not one picture of Julia

He thought he was gonna be sick he wanted just maybe one hit to set him straight he hated thinking of his many pasts and failures

_**"You should see yourself . Do you have any idea what you look like right at this moment . Spike?**_

_**"What ?" **_

_**"A ravenous beast . The same blood that runs through both us. The blood of a beast who wanders , hunting for the blood of others." **_

_**"I've bled all that kind blood away ." **_

_**"THEN WHY ARE YOU STILL ALIVE?" **_

_**"**_Spike are you ok?"

Spike came back to reality to see Faye leaning at the door . He didn't know whether to be thankful or pissed

"Im fine"

"You dont look fine . How come your up this late ?" Faye asked walking into his room

"I could ask you the same" Spike said looking through his drawers not facing her

"Well I just got back whats your excuse, having nightmares?"

If she only knew

"Yeah of you pestering me " Spike mocked

"Very funny Spike ...I was just checking on you cause I seen you wasn't on the couch and when I was going to my room I heard you panting..maybe you was having a dream about me , a naughty dream" Faye teased now laying down on his bed

Spike wanted to slap himself she just wouldn't leave him alone . Coming in his room scantily clad in sexy outfits of shorts shorts and belly tops making sexual jokes, he knew how to make her drop it though

"Please Faye maybe a while back but you got too chunky" that would piss her off

"I dont get this crappy joke that you and that thing Ed makes about me gaining weight when I didn't "

Spike started laughing , "_doesnt she know im just teasing to get a rise out of her" _he thought

Faye was sitting on his bed indian style pouting looking like she was gonna cry

_"Better fix this before she starts whining more" _

_"_I guess I really did gain weight , I'll start a diet tomorrow" Faye sniffled

"_On second thought this could be hysterical " _Spike thought smirking

"Guess so Romani , I'm thinking its the twinkies" Spike joked

"Whatever ...is it weird being here?" Faye asked

Spike didnt wanna answer yes and say its hard , but when she walked in he calmed down

"It's strange I could say that" he answered

"I know , it crazy having you back here... I really thought I would never see you again or even see you at all"

Spike sat next to her digging in his pants for a smoke

"So you did miss me huh? " Spike said while lighting up

"not really I was planning on making your room a closet"

"So the great Emotionless Faye Valentine missed me " Spike said leaning back on his bed blowing out o's of his smoke

"I have emotions Spike im not really a ice queen" Faye leaned back joining Spike as well with there feet still on the foor and there eyes on the ceiling

"You mean like the emotions you showed before I left" Spike was now looking at Faye threading into a dangerous conversation

Faye rolled over to her side proping herself up with her elbow

Spike handed her his ciggerate in the dark room all that was to be seen was the ember of the stick they was sharing, not there feelings

"I should of shot you that day" Faye whispered

"Maybe you should have" Spike said low rolling to his side as well looking into her emerald green eyes

"Would have that stopped you Spike?" Faye asked knowing the answer already

"I dont know even know anymore" he answered

"Some lunkhead told me once to stop chasing my past cause I have a future, maybe you do too..goodnight Spike " Faye said getting up to leave

"Hey Faye"

Faye turned back around to look at Spike with her heart beating so loud that she prayed he couldnt hear "yeah?"

"Try cutting down on the alcohol too, your getting a beer belly "

"Arrhhhh go fuck yoursef Spike theres a sock you could probably whack off into cause thats the only action you'll ever get!" Faye shouted then slammed the switch to the door Spike could hear her still mumbling through the hall "prick " "bastard"

and such colorful words

"Welcome back Spike" he laughed

_Faith in humans restored ..._

Faye: Men could degrate women so badly

Spike: So could women vice versa

Jet : I hear you on that one buddy

Faye: you guys are just chauvinistic jerks

Jet: like I said im with Spike on this one

Spike: next episode Girls/Girls/Boys


	7. GirlsGirlsBoys

Girls/Girls/Boys

"And never did I think that I

Would be caught in the way you got me

But Girl's love Girls and Boys

And love is not a choice

"Click ..Click..." Was all that was to be heard in a bedroom filled with bonsai .

From indiangoddes38: Good morning , how are you today?

To indiangoddess38 From TheBlackdog97: Good morning to you goddess. Sorry I haven't got back to you, been a hectic couple days . I did miss chatting with you.

From indiangoddes38 to Blackdog97: I missed chatting with you too, it's nice to know there's a sweet man out there like you who like's to have mature convo :)

Jet smiled thinking what to reply

To indiangoddess38 From TheBlackdog97: thank you, I get so tied up with crazy people I mean my coworkers that is I forget what a compliment is, man I would love to meet up with you and have a cup of coffee .

To indiangoddess38 From TheBlackdog97: I would love too, but with my work its very hard to get a break maybe sometime at the end of the month ?

"The Clock strikes at midnightttttttt! ED IS BEING MALNOURISHED! "

Jet jumped from shock and closed his laptop rubbing his bald head thinking "_how come everyone else gets there damn privacy? " _

"What were you doing wrinkly Jet?" Ed smiled

"None of your business , what's up Ed?"

"Ed is starvin like marvin and Ed found a bounty smounty"

"Well come on I'll whip you up something and we'll wake up those good for nothings"

Spike opened his eyes realizing he fell asleep on the floor wondering how the hell he got there . He smelled food and realized he better get up plus he had some planning to do . He walked in the kitchen shirtless straight to the coffee maker

"Good morning sunshine " Jet said flipping a pancake

"Good morning mom, love the cow apron you got going on" Spike mocked pouring himself a cop of coffee "where's the harpy?"

"She went for a jog, skipped out on breakfast saying she's on a diet..why, you worried about your lil friend Spike-o" Jet laughed

"She's definitely not my friend . Ed do you know how to reset the scale in the bathroom to say more than your actual weight?"

"Yes Ed does but why?"

"Well me and Faye Faye is playing a little game who could weigh more so would you do that for me..like now?"

"Could Ed play too! Are we gonna make fat piggy fatter" Ed shouted with pancakes spraying out of her mouth

"Uhh sure why not , go now before Faye gets home"

"Last one theres a rotten tampon strapon"

"Language Ed!" Jet hollered

"Sorrrrrryyy wrooom" Ed zoomed

Spike took a sip of his coffee grinning

" Spike that's really immature and you know it "

"I'm just razzing her" Spike said nonchalantly

"Sure, well on to a brighter note Ed found us a bounty "

Spike was not interested at all. he had his plans of torturing Faye today

"Well when Faye gets home we'll talk about it" Jet flipped a pancake and it fell on floor "Ein you wished that on me buddy didnt you?" "Arfff!"

Spike left to the bathroom to see how Ed was doing

"Hey Ed hows it going?"

"It is finished Monsour take a whack"

"Ok im 160 pounds so let's see what it says " Spike stepped on the scale , the numbers shot up. "Mhhm 195 , good job Ed "

"Why thank you captian " Ed saluted

"You cant tell Faye we did this Ed ok ? " Ed put her finger to her lip thinking

"Why Spike Dyke?"

"Dont call me that Ed, ever , you can't tell Faye . It's a part of the game "

"Ed smells bullshit Ed wants money or no Deal "

"You gotta be kidding me kid "

"Ed's not kidding" Ed took off her googles and crossed her arms "50 woos"

"Dammit " Spike reached into his pocket of slacks "here no squealing"

"No problemo"

"Kids , I'm making them number one on my list"

Faye walked into the ship all sweaty in yoga pants and a training bra . She was so proud of herself jogging 10 blocks . She went to fridge looking for water. Of course they was out "hmm" she spotted a beer in the back. "well, its 5 o'clock somewhere" she grabbed it and kicked the fridge with her leg. She went into the living room to sit down , when she sat she felt a leg

"Jesus Faye you almost crushed my foot with your huge ass, and you smell worse than Ein" Spike said holding his nose

Faye's eyebrow twitched "sorry to tell you but most men would find the scent of me right now a afrodisiac and my ass as well"

"The scent of wet dog an afrodisiac, I don't think so" he didnt say anything about her ass , she had a point there.

"Whatever Spike I'm not in the mood for your crude rumor" Faye opened her beer and started chugging

"Isn't beer fattening Faye?" Spike was trying not laugh while a book covered his face

"Arrrggghh" Faye picked up the the book and hit Spike in his head

"Owwww dammit Faye! You almost got my eye "

"Serves you right, well I'm gonna go weigh myself and prove you and that alien Ed wrong" Faye walked to go the bathroom leaving Spike in pain

Spike sat up lighting himself up a ciggerate waiting for the show to take place

"3...2...1"

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

Spike leaned back in the sofa quite satisfied at his work

"Whats going on !" Jet ran into the living room "is Faye ok?"

Faye walked into the living room with her head down sniffling

"What's wrong Faye" Jet asked rubbing her back

Spike thought he was gonna throw up _"here they go with there chummyness like im not even here " _

"I " sob "gained" sniffle "10 pounds Jet " Faye wailed

Jet embraced her in a hug "It's ok Faye it..uh doesnt even show"

"Yes it does Spike and Ed said it too " Faye hicupped Jet eyed Spike

Spike wanted to punch Jet for ruining his fun , he hated how tight they got

"Well since I got the two of you here we got a good bounty" Jet let go of Faye to sit down

"Lay it on me old man " Spike lifted his feet on table . Faye sat next to him and kicked his leg . Spike then pinched her. Faye then retaliated grabbing his ear

" Ouch you bitch"

Spike pulled her hair "hey ! you Jackass" Faye purple nurpled him "argghh Fat bitch!" "Pompus dick licker" "slut" "ass licker we all know your into that Spike , we seen your video collection!"

"And we know what you like trannylover!"

"Gren was more than a man you will ever be "

"yeah did you tell him that when you squeezed his boobs lesbian"

"Your just jealous Spike"

"Guys c'mon we have a bounty to discuss " Jet said trying to break up there brawl

"In your dreams fatty"

"Call me fat one more time and I swear Spike"

"What you"ll eat me?"

"Arrrggghh! " Faye lunged at Spike tackling him

"Get off me your crushing me with your obesity"

"SILENCE" Jet bellowed Spike and Faye just froze

"Now if we could behave like adults we could discuss the bounty , now sit, both of you" Faye and Spike just nodded and sat . They never heard Jet scream like that

Jet pulled up a picture on the computer of a older women in her mid 30's with Fire engine red hair and way to much makeup .

"Her name is Madame Gigi or some call her Big Red beacuse of" Jet coughed "her assets . She owns a whore house in el dey ranchero 100 miles away .she's wanted for murder , seems when a rich couple or elderly men come in she would herself or her workers take em out and steal there bank accounts, not many people know she's the owner she works in the sales department too there"

"Wow Faye , maybe there hiring "

"Shut up Spike, so what's the plan Jet? "

"Well you and Spike are gonna go in as ...well customers" Jet replied

"Why do I need to go it's a whorehouse , isn't that for guys?" Faye asked

"Well Madame Gigi likes guys, but she likes girls more"

Fayes jaw dropped

"Don't worry Faye Faye , the first time you lick the kitty is the best time" Spike said slapping Faye's back

"She like's girls with guy's involved , its her uh specialty" Jet threw in

"So what your telling me is that me and Faye have to go in as couple looking to spice up our bedroom life?" Spike asked

"Basically"

"I'm out " Spike and Faye said in unison

"Well we need the money for our little buisness plan we got going so you's have too" Jet showed them the price at the bottom "2 million woolongs, just what we need for traveling expenses, Food, Room's and fuel."

"Can't you and that demon child Ed go?" Faye pleaded

"Yeah she's right Jet how come you and Ed can't go ?" Spike groaned

"Well thats just sick , Ed's a minor , and that's just sick"

Faye and Spike sized each other up then turned the other cheek , both of them frowning

"Fine but he better behave" Faye huffed

"That goes for her too, " Spike growled

"If you's both don't behave I'll kick your sorry ass's , get ready we'll be ther in a hour . get dressed like a nice couple, and I'll give you the plans " Jet

"Fine " the obnoxious two mumbled

Spike looked at himself in the mirror liking his thread's. He was wearing Jeans, a light green button down dress shirt and and black loafers. Perfect for a night on the town with the misses looking to spice up there bedroom life . He felt like an ass . He couldn't wait for this night to be over . He figured he needed a little pregame for this. With that in mind he head to the kitchen looking for some kimd of alcohol.

"Looking sharp my man " Jet mocked

"I was born sharp Jet" Spike answered pouring himself a shot of kettle one

"Drinking on the job Spike "

"I'm gonna need it for this one ..ughhh" Spike brought the glass to his lips and tilted his head back downing the straight up vodka "I'm gonna need another" he poured another and downed it

"Faye's still not ready yet? Jesus this ain't a fashion show!" Jet asked

Spike just smiled waiting for the action to take place

"YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!?"

Spike was so happy that his little plan worked , it only cost him another 50 woos

"What the hell is that wench screaming about now?" Jet asked Spike and Ed

Spike just shrugged "beats me "

"Faye Faye's mad cause all of her new clothes don't fit" Ed sang

Jet looked just looked at the two of them raising his eyebrow

"I can't belive it " Faye stomped down the stairs "every damn piece of clothing" stomp " I just bought" stomp "doesn't fit me" Faye tugged her black tee mini dress down cause it was rising "this barley got on me" she picked up the front of it cause her breast were spilling out

Spike wanted to laugh so bad "_how dumb is she" _ even though her dress was tight no one in the room couldn't deny she looked good. She had her hair pulled back in a messy bun even though her hair was short, she wore black pointy 5 inch heels with straps around the ankles , and black nylons . She looked damn good

"Tsk Tsk..See Faye , now do you belive me about your weight gain"

"Eat me where the sun don't shine jackass"

"Ok guys now that your dressed heres the plans . You's are a couple engaged looking for a good time" Jet went trough his back pocket to get his wallet, he dug through till he found his money card "here, you bums are broke I'm assuming ?" "My funds are low , I owed money out " "I invested my cash...and lost it"

"Just what I thought. There should be enough for you's here , use it for a session with her, no one else, no going in gun's blazing, no damge , just clean and fast. Got it?" Jet was pleading with them

"We'll behave dad , don't worry you might lose what's left of your hair" Spike said grabbing the money card

"C'mon Spiegel let's bounce I wanna get this done and over with" Faye said leaving the bebop

"Coming darling" Spike seethed "this is gonna be a long night" Spike followed Faye out closing the panel to the bebop shut

"So how much did Spike give you to shrink Faye's clothes Ed?" Jet asked. He knew Spike was up to something. that boy had a unhealthy infatuation teasing her like a ten year old boy who thinks girls have cooties.

"Ed would never do such a horrible thing a ma ling to Faye Faye!"

Jet just gave her a look

"50 woolongs" Ed replied

"Does that include the scale?"

"No Spike person gave Ed another 50 for that"

Jet had a feeling this wasn't gonna stop "Jesus take the wheel"

Spike and Faye both landed there ships in the musty earth atmosphere of el dey ranchero. It looked like a barn from the outside with a huge neon sign with some letters that shorted out . Faye opened her red tail and tripped out . "Owww"

Spike hopped out his swordfish with no problem . He went to Faye and helped her up. "Why so clumsy Valentine?"

"I took a benadryl cause I'm all itchy for some damn reason . The only thing I'm allergic to I know of is that ugly ass detergent Jet uses, I use my own so that can't be it " Faye said scratching her neck

"Well don't fall asleep on me we got work to do" Spike just realized that Ed most likey used Jet's pansy detergent _"your a genius Spiegel" _

"The Pussycat Saloon" Faye read "how demure" Faye squinted

Spike and Faye walked into the brothel amazed at how tacky it was. Pink lace trimming all over , stripper poles, dark pink lighting in the atmosphere, and pictures of the workers on the walls with colorful names of "bambi" "cherry-pie" and "bubbles" Faye wanted to puke. She felt slimy already. Through her peripheral vision she caught a bar knowing that's her next spot to loosen up a lil.

"Welcome to the Pussycat Saloon, how may I help you two " asked the receptionist at the front. She was a older plump women with black puffy hair and alot of green eyeshadow.

"Hi , um me and my fiancé are looking for a little fun before our wedding. We figured why have a Bachelor and Bachelorette party separately when we could just be together" Spike said putting his arm around Faye's waist "We love doing thing's together, and Mick here knows I always wanted to do something like this" Faye started fanning herself for the scene and cause she was burning up from her rash. "I feel so naughty " Faye giggled fakely

"That's cute . Last time tested for std's?" The plump woman asked dryly . She was used to freaks coming in and out .

"6 months ago " Spike answered . Faye just gave him a look of "I don't even wanna know" Spike just shrugged

"2 years ago " Faye answered . Spike's intrest perked up. He was on the ship 2 years ago he really wanted to know why Faye would get tested for a std that long ago.

"Ok heres a paper signing your name and terms of aggrement, our Girl's our tested every three months for any sexual diseases, we have a wide variety of diffrent race's, ages, and sizes, some girls have different preferences and talents of fetishes they practice for certain customers, the charge for one night is 5000 woolongs per person , consedring its two of you's that will be 8000 woolongs cause of couple price, any thing extra such as noveltys , whips chains , urinating "

"Yeah were not into that kind of stuff . Thank you though " Spike said looking up from signing his new fak name "Mick Jagger" on the terms and conditions

"If you are intrested Mr and Mrs Jagger , we do have party favors of drugs as well, we usally keep hush hush about it . For an extra two thousand we offer any drug of your choice"

Spike gripped the pen hard . He couldn't deny that the little party favor sounded great. Everywhere latley the offer of drugs just kept popping up. He was now craving it . That ultimate high, not feeling your own senses, being powerful and and not looking at the big picture of this crappy life floating to ecstasy

"Were not into that but thanks again , do I sign here?" Faye placed her hand in Spike's while signing her fake alias "Jerry Hall"

Spike looked down at there hands intertwined and immediately relaxed

"Ok you guys are good to go . you will pay your entertainment when you pick her out and head to your room. Down the hall this way is the bar, thank you for choosing The Pussycat Saloon as your choice. Have a kinky evening"

The two walked through the house of prostitution heading straight toward the bar

"Give me a umm a slippery nipple" Faye said disgusted by the names of alcoholic beverages "whatever happend to a good old fashioned dirty martini? Or a Tom Colins" Faye asked Spike while he was reading the drink menu "I don't know if I should get a sit on my face or between the sheets" Spike said confused

"Why not the liquid viagra Spike-o " Faye said licking the rim of her drink

She was getting sloshed already, add the antihistamines to the mix

"You would love that wouldn't you Faye Faye " Spike grinned

"Hmmm" Faye replied scratching her chest "maybe, you would need that to keep up with me cowboy" Faye put her finger in her glass then licked the drop of alcohol off slowly looking at Spike straight in the eyes

"Trust me Valentine I could go all night , naturally" Spike smirked downing his drink

"Stop the dirty joke's and get the job done, quit fooling around " Jet barked through there wires

"Your no fun " Spike said through his hidden earpiece

"Why hello there" a older sleazy looking man with long greasy hair and a cheap suit squeezed Spike and Faye shoulders "welcome to the Pussycat Saloon , I'm Keith"

"Yo" Spike shook his bony hand "hello " Faye answered itching her wrist

"My my , aren't you an exotic angel. Your name ?" Keith grabbed Faye's hand and kissed it locking his eyes on her like a cobra

"My name's Jerry Hall " Faye took her hand away as fast as possible

"Like the model from the 20th century , mmhm my dear the name suits you well"

"I'm her fiance Mick," Spike intervened. He didn't like this guy

"So would you be interested in seeing our lovely ladies, Jerry and...what was your name again?"

"Mick" Spike spit some of his filter to his ciggerate on the floor of the bar

"Why yes we are Keith, we heard you have the best selection hear" Faye answered elbowing Spike to cut it out

"Follow me " Keith lead the way from the bar to more of the Pussycat Saloon. The old flower wallpaper peeling at the edge and tacky furniture was hysterical for Faye "can you belive how tacky this place is ?" Faye whispered into Spikes ear .

"I dunno if the tackys the word , creepy is more like it " Spike whispered back Keith stopped at what seemed to be a big living area with red heart shaped sofas filled with dust

Out came 15 women all different shapes , ages.

"Hi my names Buttercup , I love to party" said one girl with dark skin and long black hair

"Nah to skinny " Spike said

"Hey guy's my names Glitter and I love being chocked " said one with brown curly hair in a slutty tutu princess coustume

"To much daddy issues" Faye said

"Why hello there my names Bubbles and I've been a bad girl latley .will you two teach me a lesson ?" Bubbles had blonde hair in pigtails wearing a Catholic school girls uniform

"Hi Bubbles " Spike waved Faye pinched Spike's ass hard

"Yeah I'm sorry your not what were looking for" Spike choked out rubbing his backside

"Keith you wouldn't happen to have any Red head's would you?" Faye asked looking through the women not seeing there bounty

"Not available right now Big Red is by appointment only" Keith answered sizing the two bounty hunters up

"Listen man , me and my fiancé drove far this , is there anything you could do?"

Spike asked

"No I'm sorry she's with a client right now Mr. Jagger , And she's has certian preferences"

"If you mean women me and my fiancé here wanted a three some , we always fantasized about being with a red head . We have extra cash too" Faye pleaded in her most sugary sweet voice

Keith's eyes lit up and had a very dangerous smile

"I'm sorry sweetheart. I thought you's were having a separate night , we could arrange Big Red for you no problem " Keith placed a room key in Spike's hand

"here's your key , down the hall is room 289 wait there, Mona will guide you. Big Red will be there shortly " Keith said low

Faye and Spike followed Mona to there room , she was so in midst of talking she didn't realize the two weren't listening

"I just dont trust him Faye he's got leatherface written all over him"

"That chainsaw guy movie you made me watch that one time? No he's just a greasy pervert, look where he works Spike"

"I dunno I feel he wants to chop me up and sew me back together"

"Your being ridiculous Spike" Faye whispered loudly

"Where here ! Champagne and Vodka on ice courtesy of Mr . Keith Johns . Enjoy"

The two cowboy's walked into there room with a king size spinning bed , mirrors on the ceiling , and shelf filled with adult noveltys

"This is legit a perverts wet dream " Faye said while opening the champagne she popped the top and poured herself a glass "want some " she asked Spike

"I'm not a champagne kind of guy" Spike said unbuttoning some of his shirt looking in of the many mirrors "fine more for me " Faye downed another glass of the bubbly "pour me some of that vodka please , and by some I mean alot" Faye just listened and poured Spike a hefty glass

"Spike, Faye! You there " Jet spoke through there ear piece's

"Yeah were here we got a date with Big Red herself , she's with a client right now she'll join us in a little " Faye handed Spike his glass of vodka

"Ok good " Jet said

"Spike person did Faye Faye find out we shrunk her clothes yet cause Ed shrunk her bra's too"

"Gotta go Ed" Spike was scared of the look Faye had on her

"So Spike you shrank my clothes huh" Faye just kept walking towards Spike while he walked backwards "Ed doesn't even know what she's saying Faye "

"So that's why I'm breaking out, mhhhm what about the scale Spike-o" Faye backed him up all the way towards the bed "It was joke Faye calm your tits"

"Calm my tits?! Do you know how itchy I'am Spike " Faye grabbed his chin in her hand at this point "I understand your itchy..but it's really funny" Spike snickered

"Remember Spike I'll get you for this when you least expect it, paybacks a bitch and so am I "

"Looks like the fun started without me , I'm Madame Gigi . But you could call me Big Red "

_To Be continued_

Stay tuned for part || of Girls/Girls/Boys


	8. GirlsGirlsBoys Part II

Girls/Girls/Boys part II

"I don't wanna hear you've a got boyfriend

Sometimes you're better of alone

But if you changed your mind You know

where I am "

"Look's like the fun started without me " Spike and Faye looked to the doorway , Faye still had Spike's chin in a vice grip

"I'm Madame Gigi , but you could call me Big Red" there the murderous escort stood with Flaming wild red hair, a perfect hourglass glass figure clad in a leather corset , fishnet stockings and a strong southern tounge

"Wras urp" Spike mumbled "Hi" Faye gulped the two bounty hunter's couldn't deny that Big Red was pretty. Pretty scary looking

"Let's get the party started then shall we?" Big Red walked over to the stereo system and turned it on to play a sexy club beat with word's of "touch me " and "I'll be your slave"

"So this your guy's first time doing something like this?" Big Red asked the two

"Yeah , we wanted to try something fun you know , before we croak" Spike said grinning . Big Red's lips curved into a sadistic smile at him . She had alot in stored for them

"Sit down" she ordered the two. Spike and Faye looked at each other then complied . Big Red sauntered over to the alcoholic beverages and poured three glasses of champagne. Spike noticed from the corner of his eye that the murderous vixen slipped something in both his and Faye's drink. He had to avoid this beacuse it was to early in the game for Big Red to have the upper hand.

"Bubbly for the lovebirds?" Big Red offered her poisonous concoction to the cowboy's smiling

"I don't do champagne.. too , girly I'm a scotch and bourbon kinda guy " Spike smiled . He knew not to say vodka cause she would slip in some more shit to knock there socks off.

"C'mon stud . A little champagne dream never hurt no one " Big Red taunted

"Yeah stud, loosen up " Faye greabbed the flute from Big Red "your being boring" Faye brought the champagne to her lips. Spike wanted to slap her . _"Is she really that dense? _Spike thought _"of course she is" _Faye was just about to swallow some when he reached over the nightstand and knocked the glass of alcohol out of her hands. "Whoops, sorry darling " Spike apologized . It was the best he could come up with so poker alice wouldn't die before the night was over, she did swallow some of the slipped drink though._" I'll deal with that later" _

_"_Jesus you got all over me lunkhead! Now I'm all wet" Faye ran her hands over her soaked midriff and breast "ughh I'm itchy enough as it is!"

Red was pissed. Now that her drugging plan didn't work she had to pull out he big gun's. Hit em when they least expect it.

"You know what they say though darling" Red sauntered over to Faye sitting on her lap . "Wwwhat?" Faye stuttered turning cherry red from embarrassment

"It's more fun when your slippery and wet" Red whispered in Faye's ear , then started giving her a lap dance

"This is so degrading!" Faye whispered to Spike who was sitting right next to her.

"What Faye you that much of chump , suck it up you said you could play with the big boys" Spike whispered back to her while Big Red was gyrating on Faye's lap

"Really ? Well I'm not enjoying this idiot! I'm not really a guy as much as you say I'am , and was that with the knocking the drink all over me ?"

"Let's just say if you drank the whole glass you would be dead . Didn't your family ever tell you not to expect anything from strangers"

"What was that?" Big Red asked

"Umm I was just saying what a wonderful dancer you are " Spike choked out

"Oh , well I didn't forget about you Mr. Bourbon and Scotch " Big Red got off Faye and sat on Spike's lap . She rubbed her breast in front of his face . Spike manged to keep his stoic disinterested face straight while this was going on

"You like that huh big boy" Red leaned down and kissed him

"Mmph " Faye was getting sick of this and just wanted to go home _"horny pig! Look at him. Enjoying that smelly old ladys tounge" _

"Yummy.." Red broke there kiss and looked at Faye

"Look's like the misses is getting jealous. Why don't you give her a kiss stud"

"Hell no" Spike and Faye shouted in unison " I'm fine, I'm enjoying watching" Faye piped

"None sense I want to get off a little too. Now kiss" Red demanded

Faye scratched her neck and shrugged . Leaning in Spike's face and closing her eyes

"Are you serious? , no way" Spike turned his head away from Faye

Faye was gonna kill him before the night was over. She was just doing the job she would never wanna kiss Spike

"C'mon lets see you's play tounge hockey, she's a sexy little lady . Isn't she" Big Red pleaded

"She ain't no lady and she's not sexy, trust me" Spike murmured "but _you_ are very sexy Madame Gigi "

"Oh really limp dick ! Trust me I don't wanna kiss you either skinny ass . You look like a fucking stringbean, and sorry to tell you but _I _ rock this old broad outta the park buddy, I'm all natural" Faye stood up and grabbed the bottle of vodka by the neck and chugged

"Are you drunk?" Spike asked his partner while she swallowed

"Are you?" Faye countered

Spike sat on the bed and twiddled his dumbs looking around .

They were both drunk on the job

Big Red was starting to question the two's alias now

"Hold on, if you guys are really engaged why won't you kiss her?" Big Red asked Spike

"I will not kiss him and I dont want him to kiss me Big orange or whatever the hell your name is! " Faye shouted

"She's cranky that's all , shes getting cold feet . Right honey ?" Spike kicked Faye in the leg

"You told Keith you's are a couple and I'm not buying it " Big Red got up just staring them down "I don't like liars, what are yous cops? Or just sickos who get off together"

"NO! Were not cops, were engaged ...were a just umm nervous" Faye said itching her chest "that rash is getting bad" Spike pointed at Faye's chest

"Yeah with no thanks to you dick head!" Faye spewed

"Well then prove it " Red said

"How" Spike asked

"Touch her " Red snickered

"Where?" Spike was cluless

"Touch her breast , or kneed them I don't give a shit . Just prove it stud"

Spike just looked at Faye "can I touch the girls honey ?"

"Fine whatever " Faye walked over to Spike putting her hands on her hips

"I'm waiting " Faye huffed . Spike reached out to her chest then slid his hand to her left breast. He squeezed it then rubbed

"Now both stud" Big Red ordered

Spike reached his other hand out to the right breast and squeezed "wow " he said amazed

"I'm so itchy . Yes! Yes! That's it right there !"

"That's more like it" Big Red squealed

"Wow they feel real " Spike said examining while squeezing

"Your a complete ass , do you know that? " Faye said dreamily feeling Spike's hands soothing her itch

"Didn't you pucker up for an ass though?" Spike teased

Faye climbed on top of Spike's lap grabbing him by the collar "I thought it was part of the plan" her face was inches from his face "I didn't wanna kiss you "

"Yeah right you were practically begging " Spike moved his face closer to hers and grabbed her hips pulling her in "weren't you? Just admit that I turn you on romani" Faye's face twisted in anger "I would never get turned on by a broke loser like you"

"Bitch"

"Sadist"

"Old lady " Faye pushed his shoulders down on the bed

"Dead beat " Faye was now hovering over him

Her head was spinning

"So can I get in now too?" Big Red asked confused. the odd couple was freaking her out , something was fishy to her. They had attraction but it was as if they were never this up close and personal

"Excuse me but were having a private conversation red riding hood" Faye pronounced to the murdering prostitute

"As I was saying before I was rudley interrupted. You are a little boy to me , nothing more " Faye proclaimed in drunk stupor while grinding her body on Spike to relive her rash that now spreaded to her legs

"And your just a little girl begging for it " Spike growled squeezing her ass tightly

"Oh yes don't stop please it feels so good lunkhead" Faye purred

"You like that don't you wench"

Fayes mouth smashed against Spike's very clumsily . Spike held no restraint and joined in . There mouths were opened un gracefully . She tasted like vodka and cherry lipgloss. Her tounge licked his lips as he pushed her body more towards his

"Mmhhm I can't stand you" Faye moaned

"I'm not to fond of you either" Spike breathed

Big Red was angry. How come she couldn't join in. She wanted to have fun before she killed them . The were very rude "ahem .." she coughed trying to grab there attention

"Faye Faye and Spike Dyke are doing shame shame" Ed screamed through there earpiece

"Please Ed for the love of god go fly a kite " Faye hollered

"Ed move...I said move! What are you two idiots doing?" Jet seethed

"Who's Ed? " Big Red asked with no reply

"Catching a bounty " Spike said while Faye moaned in the background

"That doesn't sound like it, quit fooling around with each other and kill the doe! She's got a partner his name is" Jet didn't get to finish cause Spike ripped his earpiece out "What's his deal " Faye asked weakly her body was on fire and she felt weak . She shouldn't have drank that champagne with the slip in it.

"I dunno he's old and bitter" Spike said pushing his lips against hers

"I should of known you two were bounty hunters" Big Red had a gun cocked right at there heads "and here I thought I would get off and make a couple bucks, but im guessing you two freaks are broke"

Spike and Faye opened there eyes from there tounge wrestling match to see a gun pointed at the heads remembering why they came her in the first place

"Don't you two dare move. You guys pissed me off big time . I will be right back "

Big Red walked out locking the door from the outside leaving the two drunk bounty hunter's trapped

"Please tell me that's your gun I feel cause mine ain't on me" Faye whispered

"Well that ain't my gun but it's on me" Spike said nonchalantly "I'm gonna throw up" Faye said sickly

"Where's yours Faye?" Spike asked

"I dunno it's not on me . I must have dropped it or something " Faye was getting really dizzy and the room started to spin

"Good little monsters, I brought in some help so I don't break a fingernail" Big Red walked in with a shotgun and someone else behind her

"You got psycho bitch written all over you huh?" Spike said

"That is no way to speak to a lady, especially if that lady is my wife " Keith said walking in the room with a axe

"I'm really gonna die in a whorehouse ? I was supposed to die at the ponies in my old age, they would have sprinkled my ashes over the track " Faye sobbed

"Oh Keith stop stealing my thunder, this why I hate working with you" Big Red shouted

"I'm sorry sugar plum" Keith said frightened

"So back to where I was? Yes well since you tried to turn me in , and you have no money I'm debating on making this fast or painfully slow"

"Sugar plum let's bring em over here and I'll lay down the plastic, we just cleaned the carpet and all" Keith said

"Your right . Blood and brain's is a bitch to get out, get the guy Keith"

Keith went over to the bed and grabbed Spike. He turned him around and tied his hand's together with rope "on the floor. Now' Keith ordered

Faye was scared. If they tied up Spike then they were fucked. She never got them out of there jams.

"Nice hospitality you's got here " Spike mocked

"Who said for you to speak scum cowboy!" Keith kicked Spike hard in the back

Spike weezed from the pain. "I'm so glad were finally adding number's 3 and 4 to our list of bounty hunter's sweet heart" Keith said smiling

Faye patted herself looking for some weapon. She knew her glock wasn't on her but she did have a switchblade too

"Looking for this baby girl?" Red showed Faye her glock and switchblade

"You bitch how the hell did you do that?" Faye screamed

"Maybe if you wasn't so drunk you would have felt me grabbing them off you, didn't anyone ever tell you not to drink on the job? You's might be the worst bounty hunter's out there " Big Red and Keith laughed

"So were told" Faye said "listen girl to girl, you take fuzzy head over there and hang his head on a mantle and let me go" Faye smiled like the Cheshire cat

"Wow Faye you talk about use and abuse " Spike groaned

"Faye..I like that name " Big Red walked over to Faye and squeezed her face

"No I'm gonna play with you first you pretty little thing. You made me jealous earlier so now were gonna drag this out" Big Red chuckled sliding the blade down Faye's throat

Spike was nervous . He had sideshow freak by him with a axe if he tried to shimmy out off the rope. He wasn't worried about himself he was worried about the idoit shrew having a blade rake down her neck . He had to think of something

"Hey Red leave her alone and pick on someone your own size" Spike yelled out

"What's that supposed to mean" Red stopped harassing Faye waiting for an explanation

"What I mean is your a big girl, she's pretty small. why Don't you let her go " Spike said

Faye couldn't belive he was protecting her

"Plus she lives a misreble life anyway it's not like your taking anything great away" Spike

"_I should have known better" _ Faye's eyebrow twitched

"Well no can do stud muffins , I love torturing Girl's like her you wanna watch or die now ?" Red asked smiling

"My sweetie pie love's her girls. don't you buttercups?" Keith said proudly

"For the millionth time Keith stop interrupting me!" Red hollered

"I'm sorry I was just" Keith tried explaining

"This is why I hate men! Look what you've done to me ?" Red started scratching her face like a maniac

"Stop it please darling I'm sorry" Keith pleaded

"Your never sorry. Just like my father, and my ex husband right? All you men just hurt women. You's hit us and beat us till you were numb then you say your sorry right? Just like my daddy he would beat me then lock me in my room. I was never allowed to leave my room I was a prisoner. No friend's no outside world . Just beatings after beatings " Red started crying

"Sweet Umms , I would never hit you I love you" Keith said going to hug her

"They all say that " **BANG **Big Red shot Keith right in the chest

Faye and Spike just watched as Keith's body hit the floor sick to their stomachs

"Why did you kill him if he loved a monster like you" Spike asked

Big Red walked over to Spike placing the shotgun right at the temple of his head

"Why you ask? Because you men are liars ! You's use are bodies then crush our heart's . It's all a game to you's. Do you know what my ex husband did to me ?" Red asked

Spike nor Faye answered

"DO YOU?"

"What?" Spike asked

"I Found him screwing my sister in my family's barn in the hen coup. Do you know what they told me when I caught them . He told me he hates me and he loves Sue Ellen and she's pregnant with his child. I killed them three days later"

Spike closed his eyes at that. Remembering when Viscous caught him and Julia leaving his apartment. Know he realized how fucked up someone could become from a love triangle breaking up a relationship .

"You can't help falling in love with somebody . Even if there spoken for" Spike said

Faye stood there listening . This story sounded kinda familiar

"Yes they can ! He was supposed to love me not her! I was gonna give him a baby not Sue Ellen, me! That's why I kill these men who come in here. There rich , have beautiful families , and lovely wives at home. But they would rather come her and get tied up by a stranger and cheat on there wives. " Red started sobbing as she pushed the gun barrel more against Spike's temple "people don't change especially men . That's why you have to die cowboy "

"Say hi to my sister for me in hell"

Spike closed his eyes ready for it. This was it . He was going to die again . Big Red was right , people don't change . He prayed Faye would pull a move and get herself out of here . The click of Red's shotgun loading was permeated through the air .

"Any last words" Red asked ready to shoot

Spike thought hard and nothing came to mind

"Well your a man of few words . See ya" Red's finger grazed over the trigger ready to blow the cowboy's brain out

"Sorry, not today bitch" Faye slammed the champagne bottle over Big Red's head sprinkling the room with glass and golden booze . Big Red fell to the floor knocked out

Spike opened his eyes to see Big Red knocked out and glass all over . He shook his head to get some of his hair

"good move Valentine, didn't know you had it in you" Spike grinned tiredly

" I just saved your life and that's all I get " Faye grunted tired as well

"I'll maybe thank you if you untie me Faye " Faye knelt down and untied the rope around Spike's hand's

"thanks"

Spike and Faye was both getting up when they butt head's "ouch I think I'm bleeding" Faye started rubbing her head

"Fucked up night , huh? " Spike said rubbing his head

"yeah I cant lie. I'm ready to take this psycho bitch in and go to sleep" Faye said standing up and yawning "grab our money card Spike , it's by the tv."

"Yeah Jet would have a shit fit if we left it even though we caught her" Spike got up walking to the TV on the other side of the room

Faye was in deep thought as she scratched her neck. Tonight was crazy . With the whole Big Red fiasco . Oh and , making out with Spike _"I'm gonna be sick" "Let's pretend this never happend Valentine that's your best move , ughh" _Faye was so lost in thought and still intoxicated from booze, benadryl, and slipped drugs she didn't notice somone stirring

"What's taking you so long dipshit? I'm tired!" Faye hollered from the front

"I'm taking a leak , jeez don't get your granny panties in a twist "

"Idiot, I wanna go home already im itching like a.." Faye tried to scream but Big Red's hand was covering her mouth "say one word and I'll shank you missy " Faye's eye bugged when she seen the blade grazing over her abdomen

"thought you got me huh . Now I'm gonna gut you like a fish after I have my way with you " Big Red licked Faye's cheek down to her neck "you taste like him, I don't like that " she whispered in Faye's ear. Faye started thrashing to break free from the evil prostitute . Big Red brought the blade closer tearing some of her dress.

"Calm down before I hurt you" Big Red started squeezing her face tighter

"Hey Faye , you think that burger joint is still open we passed earlier ?" Spike shut the bathroom door wiping his hand's on his slacks

"Faye ? Did you fall asleep? "

"Don't say a word " Big Red whisperd "after I kill him we'll have our fun time sugar"

Silent tears started to stream down Faye's cheeks

"Faye why aren't you answering me. Are you still mad about the clothes ? Seriously Faye it's funny" Spike stopped dead in his track's to see Faye being held by Big Red

"Make one move and I'll cut her stomach wide open cowboy"

"This night just won't end will it " Spike groaned .

Faye bit Big Red's hand "Owwww you little slut " Big Red screamed

Faye tried to run but Big Red grabbed her by the throat lifting her off feet choking her.

Spike whipped out his Jericho aiming it right at her head . He pulled the trigger and nothing . Spike looked at his gun shocked "I took your clip out buddy looks like you get to see her die " Big Red cackled Faye was losing oxygen fast , her eyes were bulging and she was losing color . Spike looked around and the only weapon was the shotgun at Big Red's feet that she know had in her hands

"Spike ..please ..help me " Faye slurred

Spike ran and tackled Big Red . She shot him in the arm before he reached , she fell to the ground losing Faye in her grip "I usually don't hit woman but I think I'll make an exception for you " Spike punched her face . She wipped her head around and spit in his eyes "goddammit" Spike couldn't see he was trying to wipe his eyes when the she devil herself kicked Spike in the family jewels

"THIS AIN'T MY DAY IS IT" Spike was on the floor in pain . He seen Faye was unconscious on the ground .

"So how's life treating you bastard ?" Big Red started diggig her heel in Spike's arm that was shot "argghh " Spike screamed in pain

"I just loving seeing a man in pain , it's like a drug for me "

"Your really a messed up chick aren't you " Spike seethed he hadn't felt this much pain in a long time

"I really wish I was a man . I hate being a woman . I would love to blow my own brain's out but I'm a coward. I have nothing to live for . Did you ever feel that way?"

Spike knew that feeling all to well

"Today's my lucky day, I'm feeling ballsy and I have a audience ." Big Red walked over to where the shotgun was , she picked it up and put it in her mouth "goodnight" with a click from the trigger she blew her brain's out . She fell to the ground with a pool of blood surrounding her

Spike got up slowly taking in the strange atmosphere of death . He looked at the maniac older woman with red hair feeling pity for her . He winced from the pain in his arm as knelt down to check Faye's pulse. She was still alive , he looked at her neck and chest and seen small red little bumps "that rash is pretty bad"

"Issp coming through" 10 cop's barged through the room with Jet running behind them

"Are you's ok I heard through the earpiece alot of crazy shit , figured you's needed back up" Jet seen the two dead body's and Faye stirring "What the hell happened here?" Jet asked

"You really are a cop Jet, never there when you need em" Spike said grinning

Outside the brothel dozens of issp cops were parked questioning workers of "The Pussycat Saloon " some girls were going into custody in on it , some didn't know a thing , and many spilled info not to get incarcerated.

"What the hell was her story ? " Jet asked Spike while they was leaning on the swordfish II smoking "she hated men. Her dad beat her., Husband cheated on her with her sister in a barn and got her pregnant. She couldn't trust any men after that, guess her mind went psycho and started killing. Pretty sad story if you ask me " Spike flicked his cigg . His arm felt a little better, the paramedics took the bullet out and gave him a sling

"Whatever the case maybe she was looney, good news is issp is giving us the money even though she killed herself. The families of the men she killed is giving issp the woos to give us cause the brothel was taken down. You could say were modern day hero's " Jet gloated

"yeah some heroes, dammit I'm all itchy" Spike itched his chest

Faye walked over to the boy's with a blue blanket around her arm's

"Hey look sleeping ugly finally woke up " Spike mocked

Faye just ignored his comment

"Speaking of ugly what's those red dots all over your face Faye" Spike asked

"This crappy rash cause of you spreaded to my face , and I'm freezing" Faye spat

"Faye that don't look like a rash . Did you ever have the chickenpox?" Jet asked

"No but I had the immunization when I was little it can't be "

"That was also 70 years ago, those shots went outdated and was only valid for earth . We travel planet to planet now , that's a diffrent form of the virus you were vaccinated on earth for Faye "

"Haha you have the chickenpox pox Faye Faye your germy" Spike laughed

Faye give him the middle finger

"What about you did you have it before?" Jet asked Spike

"I dunno, I'm not worried I never catch colds even . I'm a Martian remember" Spike said while itching his neck

"Oh really Spike from the Look's of it here you got red bumps all over your neck. Guess you caught em from Faye buddy " Jet chuckled

"Dammit"

Back on the ship Spike was coverd head to toe with chickenpox. He was laying down on the sofa shirtless with a thermometer in his mouth and oven mitts on his hands. Next to him was Faye in a nightgown covered head to toe with red bumps as well "quit hogging the calamine lotion Faye, your using it all up" Spike shouted

"I'm itchy mophead!" Faye screamed back squirting the bottle all over herself

"So am I ! Can you stop being so damn greedy"

"I'm not greedy ass , and I'm glad karma's a bitch , I told you I would get you back" Faye smirked

"Yeah but if you didn't grind your body and tounge all over me I wouldn't have caught your damn disease !" Spike shouted

"1 I was drunk 2 I didn't kiss you , you kissed me and 3 I was drunk and so where you!"

"You can't use drunk twice chicken bump freak "

"Ughhh I hate you Spiegel!"

"Pipe down you two " Jet walked in the living from cooking chicken noodle soup for his patients wearing his pink apron.

He grabbed the thermometer out of Spike's mouth "103 your running high , well soups almost done after you two eat I'll give you's your medicine"

"Thanks ma, how come the bitch doesnt have to wear oven mitts"

"Cause I'm the favorite haha " Faye stuck her tounge out at Spike

"You look so ugly right now Faye that it's sad" Spike retorted

"Well she hasn't scratched that's why, if you scratch it's worst " Jet said

"Of course she isn't scratching! she used all that damn miracle lotion!" Spike screamed

"Spike-o never trust or touch a women. They'll lie you straight to your face and and have you itching " Jet laughed walking back to the kitchen

"Literally itchin is right" Spike mumbled

"Hey lunkhead I'll give you 100 woos if you scratch my back" Faye offered

"I'll scratch your's if you scratch mine romani"

"Deal! Hurry up before momma Jet comes back"

_The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do _

Spike: people can envy everybody's shitty life for the stupidest reasons

Jet: you know what they say , the grass is always greener on the other side

Faye : Jealousy is one of the seven deadly sins , it eat's you away

Ed: next episode _whiskey in the jar_


End file.
